These
Brian and
baby_henry - Profile people are completely nuts...and worst still, breeding.
Read their "
rules" if you wish to visit these breeders.
Granted some are commonsense and shouldn't even need to be told (eg the breastfeeding bit and not to endanger their kid, that they prefer short visits, don't criticise their choices of parenting, no smoking...all legit) but ffs! RUDE RUDE RUDE! I can't believe they'd actually do that!
my favourite bits
- You may be asked to pick up something for us, or run to the store for us briefly. Please do so, as part of the reason you are visiting us is to help us care for our child.
- You have not only the right but the obligation to point out anything that could physically endanger our child. You may be called on to reasonably justify it.
- Understand that Brian will generally take pleasure in hurting others in order to protect the general well being of his wife and child. Your feelings on the matter are irrelevant.
Take a look at them. either this is a joke or they are truly white trash hicks with no sense of contraception
Introduction
In order to remain fair to all family members and friends, but above all our new family, we have established these rules. These are not designed to discriminate against nor favor anyone (with the exceptions outlined in the special notice). They are simply designed to ensure that Brian and Kendra will have the most relaxed time they can with our new child. We felt it would be necessary to create these rules now rather than have an incident occur for which we would then have to make a rule.
These rules may seem harsh and unforgiving but we feel that it may be necessary to enforce the rules up front. After our child turns two months old, we will begin to ease these restrictions. Do not assume they have relaxed, we will tell you when they have. If at any time you wish to do something that is explicitly denied in this do***ent, ask us first. If we are feeling happy, comfortable, and generous (food and sleep helps) we may say yes. Your permission will also only extend to the single incident.
While the content on this do***ent may seem to infringe on your what you perceive to be your rights remember seeing our child and being at our home is a privilege, not a right. If you wish to do anything that is explicitly denied in here, you can always ask permission of BOTH Brian and Kendra. Asking one of us to ask the other is insufficient. If Kendra or Brian is unavailable, you may ask the one who is awake. If both are unavailable, refer to the do***ent "Rules and Instructions for Babysitters and Caregivers." We do not have to grant you permission, nor may you appeal or complain about it.
Special Notices
Kendra's Mother: Although it may seem unfair we will bend these rules towards tradition significantly for Kendra's mother for the first two weeks. During this period we may lean heavily on her assuming she is able to do so - she will be treated as an unpaid babysitter with unlimited visitation rights during this time and no guests.
Note to Brian's Family: This rule was created by Brian.
We may at our preference terminate this special agreement.
Great Grandpaernts: Due to their age, anyone bringing one our child's great-grandparents to see us will have full permissions to be at our home as long as the great-grandparent is there. Be aware your actions there may still result in a moratorium on your visitation rights.
Us Visiting Madison: We may come to Madison once or twice in the first two months that our child is born. We will make every effort to spend EQUAL time with all family members - when we attempt to leave, we are saying bye heading for the door.
Notes on Bringing Food: We will always appreciate a meal we don't have to cook, but don't always feel like going out with everything involved with the baby. So please feel free to bring something that could constitute a full meal for two as likely that is what it will be used for (casseroles are good). Only use disposable cookware - we don't want to do more dishes than needed. Also, please try to bring something somewhat healthy that Kendra will eat. You do not need to bring organic food - although the extra effort and cost is appreciated. Just be aware that whatever you feed her, the baby eats too.
Visiting
1.
The first weekend after the birth, there are no scheduled visits - you may drop by unannounced and without scheduling between 10 am and 8 pm. It is very much appreciated if you bring a covered dish.
2. With the exception of special occasions (announced by Brian & Kendra both), all visits during the first two months of our baby's life must be scheduled at least 24 hours in advance. This is to allow the parents and baby to rest without having to play host and hostess to everyone.
3. Scheduled visits will last no longer than two hours.
4. No visit may be scheduled within an hour of each other. This is to provide the family some alone time.
5. You may bring no more than two (2) guests with you on a scheduled visit. Be aware that your guests are your responsibility.
6. Brian or Kendra may, at any time, end a scheduled visit. We do not need to give you any reason as to why. When we do, simply say goodbye and leave.
7. If you are remotely sick - including a runny nose - you will not be allowed in our home.
8. You may be asked to pick up something for us, or run to the store for us briefly. Please do so, as part of the reason you are visiting us is to help us care for our child.
Handling the Baby
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Prior to handling our child, use some of the antibiotic hand lotion provided for you. During the first two months of our child's life, s/he does not have a very strong immune system. Once it has built up, we won't be as paranoid. But until then, you have to use it.
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Always support the baby's head.
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Always use both hands to support the child.
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Never take your eyes off the baby.
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Handling the baby is a privilege you must request (see Specific Rules, below).
Your Rights & Responsibilities
1.
You have the right to bring healthy food.
2.
You have the right to remain silent. Espesially when someone is sleeping.
3.
You have the right to not come see our child.
4.
You have not only the right but the obligation to point out anything that could physically endanger our child. You may be called on to reasonably justify it.
5.
You have the responsibility to ensure that your guests are behaving in a proper manner at all times. Should any of them violate the rules of this do***ent, you will be held accountable.
6.
You have the right but not only the responsibility to break any of these rules, as long as it is to preserve the health and physical welfare of the child. Again, be prepared to account for your actions.
Specific Rules
These rules always apply, even if you are not at our home. We will apply repercussions as we see fit should you violate any of these rules. Always remember, this is our child, not yours.
Unless permitted by Brian AND Kendra, do not:
1.
Criticize or make any remotely disparaging comment on other people, including other family members.
2.
Smoke on our property or in the same general airspace as our child. General airspace is defined as any enclosed structure, or within thirty yards outdoors.
3.
Touch or pick up the baby.
4.
Take our child to any religious service or event.
5.
Criticize or make any remotely disparaging comment on our religious choice and practices.
6.
Criticize or make any remotely disparaging comment on breastfeeding, including doing in private, public, or when we should wean.
7.
Criticize or make any remotely disparaging comment on our choice to use cloth diapers.
8.
Criticize or make any remotely disparaging comment on how we are raising our child.
9.
Complain while in our home.
10.
Complain about our rules.
11.
Pick up our child if our child weighs more than any medically mandated weight limit. This is for both our child's safety as well as your own.
12.
Feed the child. This is for two reasons:
1.
Breastfeeding has been medically proven to be healthier than formula, and we are giving our child that benefit.
2.
When our child is able to begin to eat other foods, we are going to try and avoid food allergies. We will be able to do so by introducing our child to new foods as specified by our doctor. You may have had your own child, but you're still not a doctor.
Repercussions
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Failure to adhere to any of these rules will result in the loss of all visitation rights for a minimum of two weeks on a first offence.
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Excessive or hurtful violations will meet with harsher punishments.
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We will notify you by phone when we are ready to lift the ban.
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Before it can be lifted, you must write a letter stating why what you did was wrong and that you would be willing to allow Brian to enforce any punishment he chooses.
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Any attempt to justify your actions after our decision is made will result in harsher punishment.
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Any attempt to try and convince Brian or Kendra to keep violations from each other will result in harsher punishment.
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Understand that Brian will generally take pleasure in hurting others in order to protect the general well being of his wife and child. Your feelings on the matter are irrelevant.
Final Note
Kendra and Brian are ones who are solely responsible for the physical, social, and spiritual upbringing of ourselves and our children. These rules are designed to help ensure that our decisions are kept, regardless of what others may feel. We have thoroughly discussed and researched our options. If we feel we need your input we will ask you for it. In order to ensure that there are no misunderstandings, please do not offer your opinions on any of these matters unless it is to preserve the physical welfare of the child, and under no cir***stances should you attempt any of these things covertly. You will not like the repercussions for attempting to "go behind our back."
Brian will ensure it.