So after working for 12 hours straight with no chance to eat ANYTHING during the day except my breakfast I went home really sad and stressed and depressed and then my boss calls me saying I had to take some photos at this dreadful event and I just lost it. Like I started crying hysterically, think Paris Hilton going to jail type of tantrum, I was just so fucking overwhelmed by tiredness and the prospect of going out again was just dreadful.

I don't know what I'm going to do. I cannot lose this job. I really can't. What would be of me?? and I know that I'm less than spectacular at it and I don't trust my boss, he has me doing this INSANE things, like going from one corner of the city one minute and then go to the other end the next, and insane assignments, I just don't know what to do. I'm like walking on thin ice 24/7.

See I got changed to the news section of the newspaper and it's so crazy, like you wouldn't know. I want to go back to the fashion/magazine section, I'm supposed to do that in two weeks and I hope it goes to plan.

They are all out to decontruct me and build me into a macho rambo type of person that I'm not. Why can't they just let me be?? just let me be in the magazine section where I know I do a good job instead of being in this insane life threatening section, ugghhhh.

do you really want this job? if it's stressing you out so much, is it worth it? i mean.. it's just work, right? you could possibly look into finding a more stable job with normal work hours.

but if it's your dream job and if it's what you really want to do, i guess you just have to hang in there. it will get better once you get promoted to a higher position.
also: you should probably take a few snacks with you so that you have something to eat quickly during work hours, so that you don't feel so shitty afterwards.

yes I used to do that for a while. I mean this job can get me places, and I don't want to be a failed asshole alcoholic or a simple nobody secretary like my fahter and mother. I don't like talking about them in such way but that's what they are, this is like a house of failure and abandonment, and I don't want to be like that but this job is overwhelming to be honest.

Waitwaitwaitwait, you take pictures all day?

Fuck your whining, you snobby arse.

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"the height of arrogance is the height of control of those who create God in their own image"

you are a crisis.

In any job in any field you want to work in you always have to do the shit work before you get anywhere good. You start at the bottom and work your way up. This is just a stepping stone. If its what you really want to do then suck it up and do it!! You'll eventually get past this and get to the place in the company you want to be at. Oh and Shashtasheens right you need to bring some snacks so your not starving all day at work.

try turning work into a game.

if i was a photographer, i'd pretend i was jo reynolds from melrose place. not to say i'd dress up like her or anything, but i'd adapt her speech patterns and the slighty abrupt but essentially everygirl way she has about her.

I Had This Crisis One Time.












It Was About Chord Changes!

Running around like a chicken with your head cut off is part of any "news" operation.

Sucks, but it is the way it is.

this is why you're alone. hangnail MY LIFE IS OVER, clouds in the sky JESUS HATES ME.

grow the fuck up you little pussy bitch.

__________________

Jesus doesn't hate me, he loves me.

You should more concerned with the fact that you missed the entire point.

Are you an anti-semite?

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no I'm not. I'm anti-being an asshole and lots of jews are assholes.

i think its a crisis that youre allowed to share the same oxygen as the rest of us.

aw, is that what your mommy told you?

Let's encapsulate.

You had a hideously busy day at work and did a 12 hour shift, where you only ate breakfast. Your boss sent you on these assingnments across town. Sorry if this sounds disingenuous, but don't they have sandwich bars in Panama? People in New York and London have to work phenomenally long hours and tend to grab their food as and where they can.

And how exactly IS working on a newspaper a precusor to the powers that be trying to turn you into this ultra hypermasculine stereotype? Unless you are working for a notoriously right wing tabloid or broadsheet, no one will give a flying fuck if you are butch, screaming or in between as long as you are doing the job efficiently. If they have a fashion supplement, they can't be THAT blatantly homophobic.

Believe me, there are a LOT of more soul destroying jobs than having to take photos of boring events. Try working in the public health care sector where despite the best training, you get paid subsistance wages and deal with a disproportionate amount of abuse not only from the public, but from doctors, consultants and middle management.

Did you ever think that if you do the boring and mundane shit above and beyond the call of duty that might grease the wheels if you want to get into the fashion/beauty section? Unless you're a trust fund babe, you'll have to suck up RuPaul's advice : "You gotta work!"

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*Huggy Ragnarsson Is My Co-Pilot*

"coming up on kittyradio, an erotic thriller featuring Shannon Tweed..."

I saw some movie where there was some sort of catastrophe thingy that started in Panama. Let's chant for this to be actualised. I know it's harsh to want the rest of Panama destroyed just to cleanse the world of HCH, but... meh. CHINA CRISIS.

__________________
Time is the distance that you can't return by miles.

I escaped somehow. Let's go

actualy [sic] I have quite a blessed life if I'm honest. I have many people to love, hate few and have few money problem's [sic].... What more does a person need? Oh yeah and I have some kind of humbleness unlike you of course ^_^ ~ CarefulCarpenter

hahaha, so by making that statement, you're an anti-semite.

FYI.

__________________

But some of his best friends are Jews!

NOT REALLY

__________________
Time is the distance that you can't return by miles.

I escaped somehow. Let's go

actualy [sic] I have quite a blessed life if I'm honest. I have many people to love, hate few and have few money problem's [sic].... What more does a person need? Oh yeah and I have some kind of humbleness unlike you of course ^_^ ~ CarefulCarpenter

well I do love Elizabeth Taylor and Amy Winehouse, though Liz converted to judaism so I don't really consider her jewish.

Oh and I used to be a trust funb babe and I'm not anymore and it has tainted my days with some bitterness.