Not quite funeral etiquette. More pre funeral i guess, although funerals scare the shit out of me.
So my aunt died on saturday, and my cousin and my uncle came round today. I didnt know they were here, and i havent seen them since my aunt died. I walked into the kitchen for dinner and everyone was eating and all I could think of to say was "Oh, I didnt know you were here. Hi!"
I knew I was meant to say "I'm really sorry etc." but it didnt seem appropriate whilst we were eating. So I sit down, and everyone is pretty tense, and i could tell they were blatantly waiting for me to say something as my bro was giving me the "oi Retard" face, and my phone starts ringing. I wish i was making this shit up, but my ringtone is "Dont fear the Reaper" by The Blue Oyster Cult.
What the fuck am I about?!

All I could do was press reject and pretend nothing happened. Ive never eaten so fast in my life.

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"They call me BLUD, they call me RUDE BOY, they call me OI, they call me MATE, that's not my name!"

Its not your fault people embrace your aliveness and call though. When Im around people that have just lost someone, I just can't say 'im sorry for your loss'. It just sounds not right coming out of my mouth ya know. What did you eat anyway?

i kind of lolzed at this. i went to my grandma's funeral last month and my mom decided to die her cigarette out on the outside wall of the church. something tells me that was an etiquette faux pas.

I just pretend nothing's happened.

I've only been to one funeral. On the way to the grave before she was buried I laughed really loudly as I read a tombstone with the name 'FANNY RUMBLE' R.I.P on it. It still makes me laugh to this day.

someones name was fanny rumble?

Yes. Maybe she was friends with Ruth Price?

thats my new name now

i always hate the feeling of having to say something at funerals. i hate them.'

i went to a great aunt's funeral i was really close to. we were sitting in the chapel, and they started playing this horrible hymn record. my cousin and i were sitting next to each other, and we both started cracking up. and couldn't stop. the more we both tried to stop the worse it got. i was humiliated all at the same time. i mean we both loved my Aunt Linnie dearly. i felt like i was disrespecting her. but, the record was so horrible. i mean horrible. i sounded like William Hung singing. i guess we were nervous and upset to. but we giggled through most of the service. it was definately one of my low points.

the last funeral i went to was great too. a friend, sandy, died in a house fire. we went and got tweaked on the way home from the funeral with her brother, and had to sit at her mother's house with her family high as bat pussy. i mean she would have probably loved the idea. but, we were with her redneck family. her and her brother were big fag hags. the rest of her family were not. so, our little group probably made quite an impression without being all strung out over the ktichen table.

so, i guess i don't have great funeral etiquette either.

i have a dead relative called FANNY BOIL.

i imagine big red boils all over her dead rotting fanny

Stop it, you're turning me on.

i was eavesdropping ronettes screen before and i literally burst out laughing at some comment you made about pregnancy being the worst STD of them all.

kudos to you

So, your place or mine?

fanny is bum here yeah its even grossercos in the uk its all like thefrontbutt right

ewwww

yeh that's why the intro to the Nanny is so funny.

out on her FANNY. it's so funny to imagine her cunt slamming into the pavement n getting gravel in it n stuff wouldn't be the only stones up her vadge.

Its why fannypack may be extremely misunderstood, yet hilarious here.

fanny pack dont make much sense cos it goeson the front anyway
*shrugs*
haha my mom used to rock those!

I don't have a prblm w/ funerals.

but what is that thing called where you go to the funeral home and hang out in the room with the body?

i had to go to that for my witch bitch cunt of an aunt's husband.

and i mean.

yr just sitting there. with the body. and i never even met this dude before.

sitting there. and sitting there. and sitting there some more. i thought we should've at least gotten a game of yahtzee going or sthng.

lol don't fear the reaper.

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YOU'LL BE DOING HAIR, AND MAKEUP, AND ANSWERING THE PHONE.

HAHa don't fear the reaper.. this entire thread had me laughing
sometimes when someone tells me someone died i smile a little bit, just because i know i probably shouldn't
&i get a bit excited

I swear it's called a "wake."

I want someone to string me up and do puppetry at mine.

i went to my grandma's wake.

and it was more like.

a bunch of ppl sitting like an audience in front of a casket. (i felt sorry for the ppl who weren't as close to her as i was for having to be there btw. it's all sort of retarded.)

this here that we were doing for the au