Hello my babies. Hows everyone doing today?


Ok, I need some feedback/thoughts..Or situations YOU`VE been in & how you
handled them?

Heres the thing.

A lot of you know my baby sis has been addicted to meth, I believe for
the last 12 yrs of her YOUNG life? On serveral occassions she`s tried to
"Get clean" but of course it doesn`t last longer than maybe 6 months?
Been on & off the streets,in constant trouble with the law,jail,rehab,back at home with "MOM" (dun dun dun) has had guns pulled on her,friends murdered,
lied,stolen (from mom & stepfather countless times) You know the WONDERFUL things meth brings into your world!

I myself have moved her into my home..TWICE over the years to help her
get it together,only to have her pull the same shit with me.
(lying/using in MY home..Turning our place into a living nightmare!)

Last April her boy for the last 5 yrs was released from jail (user as well)
They started going to church,got saved & were married.

Our stepfather & SAINT! Paid for their wedding,forgave them (again)
for all the shit they`ve done over the yrs..Gave them a place to stay,got
her husband a job & gave them the $ to buy their dream car..
(which they pawned)
In june Tonya called me..Freaking out! She had cervical cancer & needed
surgery,so my girl & I drove out to Cali & I took her.
(moms to wrapped up in her own shit)

We talked for hrs about her life,how much I loved her & how proud I was
of her for pulling it together (she`d been CLEAN 6 months)

On my b-day (july) my mother calls me..Sobbing..

"Tonya & David broke into our room..Stole our safe"
(which had the deed to their house..Family heirlooms & about $1700 in cash)

& took off!

Stepfather filed charged & a restraining order on her
(them)


Afew months pass without a word,til sept..(money ran out?)
Anyways, they were pulled over & her husband RAN (3 times & got away)
He broke parol & is now a REAL WANTED MAN!
I mean seriously..He`s been on the news,in the papers there on
some prior bullshit.

Well, she calls me last night because their about to be on the street again..Living with a friend whose leaving state in afew days..Basically
I pulled NO punches with her! I told her I loved her,but I also told her
how disappointed I am in her & that its going to take a LONG time before
I EVER trust her again..Along with all the shit she`s done to our family
over the yrs & basically.......HOW COULD YOU?!

(I`ve never been THIS blunt with her)

Our stepfather is willing to help her, once again (mother already is in a way)
if she gets into a treatment center & turns herself in for the theft.
She`s already asked them for the $ to get her car back (the nerve)
I confronted her on the safe (shes lied about taking it) I told her I KNOW
you did it so DONT BULLSHIT ME!! She pretty much came clean.

During the conversation,she admitted she fucked up,how our stepfather
didn`t deserve this.
& her life wasn`t ..That bad..How good she has had it,
what shes doing to our mother & family..&&&&&&&&&&& she told
me (god I can`t believe this) on this last "Run" she graduated
from smoking it to straight out shooting it??!! She said her arms are all tracked up now.I asked her..WHY? I don`t know,because I wanted to die?

Now I know this is prob true..The thing is..She`s a GOOD con & has
done nothing but play us all..Time & time again.

(what druggy doesn`t?)

So when I asked her.."Well where are you going to go/do?"

"Prob be on the streets"

I didn`t offer to take her in this time. I told her I loved her,but
its going to take a long time before I can ever trust you again,Tonya.

She said I know & thats pretty much where it ended..I told her
to stay in touch with mom so I know where you are..

After we hung up..I brokedown! I can`t believe
this is my baby sis..The one I watched over,protected,raised when she was an infant because my mother was in & out of hospitals (breakdowns)

Did I do the right thing by NOT offering to take her in?? Should I have offered? Was I not understanding/forgiving enough?

I just don`t know????????

I`m so afraid for her,I don`t want her to think I DON`T love
her,but I can`t trust her & I nolonger know if shes being REAL
with me..Or simply playing on my heartstrings?

Oh baby. I feel like I read this same thread about 4 years ago.

You're doing the right thing. XXXXX

this thread really kinda hits home. ive got tears welling up because i know exactly how you feel. there comes a point where you cant catur to it any more because youre only enabling them. my grandmother finally told my mom off about living here when i was like 14. she is an adult now. the sad thing is meth gives her the reasoning and rationality of a teenager. you know, you;d think having been through this i'd know exactly what else to say. im just as much at a loss with my mom as you are with your sister. i get hone calls at 3 and 4 a.m. when she's twacked out of her mind on ice and she thinks because i still smoke pot that i think its perfectly fine that she still does meth, and i dont. it hurts me every time i talk to her so i dont answer her calls. sometimes i think you just have to accept these things. i dont forsee my mom changing any time soon.
all you can do right now is love your sister hard. she probably needs love more than anything else in the world right now. and not letting her live with you is the right decision. it will just perpetuate the cycle and you dont deserve to be burdended with it trina.

Yea, you prob have?

In fact it might have even been MY thread? The thing is, I just don`t know what to do anymore??

We`ve tried pretty much EVERYTHING with her..
From talking,pleading,praise,forgiving,taking her in,getting her into rehabs,
getting her her own place.. What have ya.

She gets clean for awhile & we all start believing in her
again.. Then like a reacuring nightmare its starts all over again?

It was your thread. I know you've struggled with her for years. God bless.