i work in a care home/hospital as a nursing assistant and see death frequent. We have 32 rooms which people come and "go" and the ones that are sitting waiting to die often talk to me about what they expect. Iv been with people on their last breath,watched them get put in a bag and wheeled into the back of a car...yes that is how their life ends - in a boot of a bloody car. Because theyr old 80% of them drift away in their sleep and just never wake up but for those who have illnesses dont go quite so easily and its painful and so distressing to watch. I must say though,working with death has made me less scared and dealing with dead bodies has kind of eased the thought of dying.. all you see in horror movies are blood and guts and thats what i thought death was but really its just a lifeless body ... just a shell. I often think about how i will die and really hope its quick and i dont develop some crazy ilness and end up bedbound and wait to rott.

Chronologically, I'm the closet here at KR to the arbitrary limits of life expectancy. the truth is that many people are dead long before their body fails. Spirit is what's vital. I see man people wasting away their years in fear of death-- but really what they are afraid of is living. It doesn't make sense, really, but life is what is painful-- death is peaceful.

When people have passed we often wish we could have told them how much we cared for them. Telling people always reminds them that they are only mortal, and people would prefer to not think of death at all. I had the chance to tell my mother how much I appreciated her before she passed on. It was emotional, but great for both of us. I thanked her for the gift of independence.

__________________
"Tell me what you see; and I'll know where you are"
~~cc

I gave love; you gave me a thistle;
We shared tenderness; then you ran away;
I planted a rose; and you blossomed;
I had fresh hopes; tho' winter froze them solid

I think the grief people share over the death of loved ones usually equates no matter what culture you're in. I think this is proof that 99 % of the population does not feel absolutely sure by any means that they will see their loved one again after death. I don't think there's anything wrong with ultimately fearing the apparent end that is death. Admittedly, I find it very defeating emotionally.