So much as we all love our pets, sometimes they do stuff (whether their own fault or not) that makes you at that moment in time hate them a little bit. Having just had a moment like that with my not-so-darling cat, I thought it might be time to share because some of these stories can be quite funny.

When my cat feels he has not been fed when he is hungry, he eats soil and then vomits as some sort of protest (he verges on slightly tubby, so he is not eating soil out of desperation before anyone accuses me of starving my pet). Yesterday I slept in a bit, so he was a bit late to get his breakfast. He was not best pleased.

So I get out of bed and there is the cat looking very loving and purry and friendly. Then I notice, oh no, cat puke in the hall. Now my cat is inevitably sick twice - so instantly I start looking for the next pile. And see a frankly HUGE quantity of cat puke on the sofa. He must have drunk about a pint of water to produce that. Then I turn to the left and see more puke. And then right, and more puke. All this time he is purring away and begging me for breakfast.

Despite being still shrouded in sleep, I desperately trying to think which pile I should start on when I hear the mail arrive, and like a homing missile it lands straight in the hallway pile of cat puke. Face down. And when I pick it up and scrape some of the cat sick off it, its not mail for me, its urgent mail for my landlord.

So that is why I hated my cat a little yesterday. Anyone else want to share?

cats get funny when it comes to feeding time
we had a cat, mojo52fang, that would run down a long hallway of hardwood floor at top speed
slide, slamming into whatever he slid into (walls, doorways, furniture, etc.)
run down then up a staircase, also at top speed
until he got someone out of bed
of course, looking innocent as he stood at your feet to trip you up while you filled his bowl

i do believe in the
'cats rule their owners'

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[ o ]==#

That's the whole trouble. You can't ever find a place that's nice and peaceful, because there isn't any. You may think there is, but once you get there, when you're not looking, somebody'll sneak up and write "Fuck you" right under your nose.” - J. D. Salinger

a spiritual being having a human experience

a few months ago my dog went into the garden and trod in fox shit. it was raining so he was also covered in mud. and was wet. his fur is thick and long. he came running into the house, leaving wet fox shit and mud all over the kitchen floor and then tredding it into the hallway carpet.

i was scrubbing for over an hour at that LITERAL shit.

i hit him with a wooden spoon and he gots no walk that day because i just couldn't bear to look at him.

i used to get all upset when my cat would bring lizards to the closet and slowly torture them to death.

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No tongue, my lipstick!

My cat for some reason reacts to me being stressed (not that I ever even show it noticeably to him) by pooing on my carpet. So whatever exam I am doing, I always know the night before I will be scrubbing poo out of my carpet...