Just wondering if most of you parents or those who want kids one day...have a gender preference for your kid(s)? I know most say "Anything healthy" but beyind that, have you ever felt you'd be a better parent to a certain gender? Or is there some reason you wanted one or the other? Or one of each? etc..Did you ever think there's an ideal number of kids you wanted to have- did you always want just one "only child" or did you always want a large family because you were an only child, or did you want a large family because you grew up with a lot of siblings? etc...Just curious...
Me--> Grew up with a family that is not close. 1 older bro, who's 6 years older and never been close. Not close to my parents. I'm not outgoing, I'm a total introvert so it was always hard to make good friends.....so, I always wanted at least 3 kids as long as I could financially care for them. Would love 4, would settle for 3. I wanted at least 2 girls and if I'd only have 2 kids I wanted 2 girls but I did want at least one more kid, a boy...so I wanted at least 2 kids, preferably 3, and possibly 4 but not more. My body can't handle 4 though. I doubt I'll even have 3. And I always wanted 2 girls because I longed for a sister SOOOOO bad, it's selfish in a way but I wanted very much for mt daughter to have a sister. If I'd had a boy instead I'd still have been thrilled, but would have been a little sad, for some reason, I wanted a sister so bad and I have always thought of a sister as a soul mate, a best friend..lifelong companion...etc. I idealize sisters. But have been told by half the female friends who have them that they were never nearly as close as my idealized idea of sisters and some were downright just not close at all. The other half say their sister IS their best friend.
I think I wouldn't know what to do with a boy, at least, I think I wouldn't know what to do if I *only* had boys....but also people have told me that mothers and sons have really special, unique bonds..I was told that there is no bond I can have with my daughters that couldn't be just as special if not more with a son. I also have a friend who's a girly girl, and she always dreamed of having daughters so she could babydoll them up, fix their hair, go dress shopping, do makeup, talk girl talk, play Barbies and princess and dress up. She had 3 boys....and says she would not trade any of them for a girl.
Just have insomnia and am up comtemplating this. If mothers have gender preferences, is it wrong, selfish, and due to our own baggage?? Or is it normal?
My husband is one of 3 brothers and his mother wanted a girl BADLY. The 3rd birth was so bad, she did not try one more time...he always says if she had tried one more time and it had been a girl...they would have hated her because she would have been one rotten, spoiled, coddled, special-treatment receiving brat! LOL. I think that;s another issue, parents who cannot treat their children as separate but equal. My parents always treated me crappily while treating my brother like a god among men, probably another reason I always wanted a girl. Issues much, yeah...
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