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  #1  
Old 08-20-2006, 01:02 AM
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Perfectionism projected onto a child

Jon Benet was a victim of parental malignant narcissism and the obsession for perfection in a mother. People like this don't love their children--they use them.
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  #2  
Old 08-21-2006, 04:53 AM
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Is this a question or a statement?
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  #3  
Old 08-21-2006, 05:22 AM
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do you mean that she drove somebody to murder her kid?
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  #4  
Old 08-21-2006, 05:25 AM
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You know, the second I saw this thread title, I knew it would be a paladin thread.
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  #5  
Old 08-21-2006, 05:49 AM
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The title of the thread makes sense, it's just you go overboard in stating "People like this don't love their children--they use them" .
That's bull.
Am I saying it's right for parents to project perfection (like entering them in beautypagents) onto their kids?
No, not at all, but to say they don't love them is bull.
Unless you know each one of the parents who do this personally, it's only your oppinion that they don't love their kids, and you would be wrong.
Are we now assuming mother Ramsey didn't love JonBenet?
She might have done things I personally wouldn't, but to say she didn't love her daughter is awful.
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  #6  
Old 08-21-2006, 05:53 AM
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[quote=VioletPrue]
No, not at all, but to say they don't love them is bull.
QUOTE]
i think they dont love them in a proper manner.
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  #7  
Old 08-21-2006, 05:55 AM
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i dont think anyone even knows how to love in a proper manner anymore (ifever
thawng being said!
its really not for you to judge mr paladindizzle
judge not!
lest
the thawngz eat you
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Old 08-21-2006, 06:42 AM
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Yeah, there's no right kind of love, just various shades of wrong.
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  #9  
Old 08-21-2006, 11:10 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by creez
Quote:
Originally Posted by VioletPrue
No, not at all, but to say they don't love them is bull.
i think they dont love them in a proper manner.
How can you tell if the parents don't love in them in a proper manner?
And who decides what proper is?
You?
Me?
Paladin?
God help us all.
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  #10  
Old 08-21-2006, 01:04 PM
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Maybe Patsy Ramsey was naive considering she was in beauty pageants and didn't think that anyone would want to hurt her child?

She probably took in her own personal beauty pageant experience as something positive and wanted her daughter to have a good self esteem and thought it would be good for her?

How can you claim she didn't love her own child?
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  #11  
Old 08-21-2006, 01:24 PM
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Jesus H., who cares about that little troll doll? The whole thing is so fucking tired. Give a shit about a different child, America. I think this one's corpse has received enough useless Get Well Soon cards. Perhaps we could do the living children, who aren't dying miraculously, a few favors now?

The whole thing is so fucking disgusting and voyeuristic. She's like some celebrity saint with her little 6 year old titties on a platter.
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  #12  
Old 08-21-2006, 02:28 PM
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shes my idol
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  #13  
Old 08-21-2006, 02:34 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bunny gamer
Jesus H., who cares about that little troll doll? The whole thing is so fucking tired. Give a shit about a different child, America. I think this one's corpse has received enough useless Get Well Soon cards. Perhaps we could do the living children, who aren't dying miraculously, a few favors now?

The whole thing is so fucking disgusting and voyeuristic. She's like some celebrity saint with her little 6 year old titties on a platter.
People are doing a few favors for living children, the media just only pays attention if it's a celebrity doing it.
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  #14  
Old 08-21-2006, 02:54 PM
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I dont agree with what you said...but...OMG that titties on a platter comment made me LOL...
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  #15  
Old 09-03-2006, 02:23 PM
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After you've seen the movie "Little Miss Sunshine", then come back and we'll discuss this from a better perspective.

Love is not building high, and often unrealistic expectations, for a 6 year old.


Edit: IMO

Last edited by paladin : 09-03-2006 at 04:36 PM.
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  #16  
Old 09-03-2006, 02:42 PM
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a lot of little girls like dressing up and being told they're beautiful. they also often like singing and dancing (i was quite amazed at what a good performer jonbenet was, they had footage on the news recently). such activities can build confidence

i did some musicals when i was in high school and performing was really good for me. before that i had zero confidence
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Old 09-03-2006, 02:54 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by renegade_princess
a lot of little girls like dressing up and being told they're beautiful. they also often like singing and dancing (i was quite amazed at what a good performer jonbenet was, they had footage on the news recently). such activities can build confidence

i did some musicals when i was in high school and performing was really good for me. before that i had zero confidence
The difference may have been that you were interested in it or were developing your own passions. Your story sounds healthy and a confidence builder. Do you know how it feels later in life when you are no longer living up to the expectations set for you by others? It can lead to self-destruction and the feeling of letting others down--such as not measuring up to your Mother's ideal image of who you were supposed to be--a real drag I would think.

I knew a man who worked for Shirley Temple when she was an adult. He said she was a fine and decent person who treated others with respect. This sounds like the product of a loving mother, to me.

Last edited by paladin : 09-03-2006 at 04:34 PM.
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  #18  
Old 09-03-2006, 04:16 PM
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its not for us to judge
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  #19  
Old 09-03-2006, 04:52 PM
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Definition: Judgment

Quote:
Originally Posted by Wikipedia
In non-legal contexts, a judgment is a balanced weighing up of evidence preparatory to making a decision. A formal process of evaluation applies. A judgment may be expressed as a statement, e.g. S1: 'A is B' and is usually the outcome of an evaluation of alternatives. The formal process of evaluation can sometimes be described as a set of conditions and criteria that must be satisfied in order for a judgment to be made. What follows is a suggestive list of some conditions that are commonly required:
there must be corroborating evidence for S1,
there must be no true contradicting statements,
if there are contradicting statements, these must be outweighed by the corroborating evidence for S1, or
contradicting statements must themselves have no corroborating evidence
S1 must also corroborate and be corroborated by the system of statements which are accepted as true.

One should be cautious in attributing, without a rigorous analysis, a rigid set of criteria to all forms of judgment. Often this results in unnecessary restrictions to judgment methodologies, excluding what may otherwise be considered legitimate judgments. For analogous difficulties in science and the scientific method see the Wikipedia entry on the scientific method.

From the criteria mentioned above, we could judge that "It is raining" if there are raindrops hitting the window, if people outside are using umbrellas, and if there are clouds in the sky. Someone who says that despite all this, it is not raining, but cannot provide evidence for this, would not undermine our judgment.

However, if they demonstrated that there was a sophisticated projection and audio system to produce the illusion of our evidence, then we would probably reconsider our judgment. However, we would not do this lightly, we would demand evidence of the existence of such a system. Then it would need to be decided again upon available new evidence whether or not it was raining.

Many forms of judgment, including the above example, require that they be supported by, and support, known facts which are themselves well supported, and its negation must be shown to be unfounded, before it is accepted as well founded.
Contrast choice.



"Is not for us to judge others, but to choose wisely from the examples and consequences from which others before us have made their way known. Even this is illusory; but history and reality are not always what they appear to be. The wise sojourner looks behind the veil of imagery at the deeds and the acausality of the consequences, rather than accepting at face value, the illusions of innocence, or complicity"
~~carefulcarpenter
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  #20  
Old 09-03-2006, 08:29 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bunny gamer
Jesus H., who cares about that little troll doll? The whole thing is so fucking tired. Give a shit about a different child, America. I think this one's corpse has received enough useless Get Well Soon cards. Perhaps we could do the living children, who aren't dying miraculously, a few favors now?

The whole thing is so fucking disgusting and voyeuristic. She's like some celebrity saint with her little 6 year old titties on a platter.
I'm kind of getting to feeling like this after all the hoopla. Which is mean-spirited of me, but as time goes on the current storm of interest in some crazy attention-seeking guy will look more and more ridiculous. Ah, the benefits of hindsight.

I also agree with Violetprue.
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