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  #1  
Old 11-27-2007, 12:12 PM
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Myspace hoax drives girl to suicide

Girl's suicide after online chats leaves a town in shock

DARDENNE PRAIRIE, Mo. - For nearly a year, the families who live along Waterford Crystal Drive in this bedroom community northwest of St. Louis have kept the secret about the boy Megan Meier met in September 2006 on the social networking site MySpace.

He called himself Josh Evans, and he and 13-year-old Megan struck up an online friendship that lasted several weeks. Then the boy abruptly turned on Megan and ended it. That night, Megan, who previously had battled depression, committed suicide.

The secret was revealed six weeks later: Neighbor mother Lori Drew had pretended to be 16-year-old "Josh" to gain the trust of Megan, who had been fighting with Drew's daughter, according to police records and Megan's parents.

After their daughter's death, Tina and Ron Meier begged their other neighbors to keep the story private. Let the local police and the FBI conduct their investigations in privacy, they pleaded.

But after waiting for criminal charges to be filed against Drew, neighbors learned that local and federal prosecutors could not find an applicable statute.

Furious neighbors - and in the wake of recent media reports, an outraged public - are taking matters into their own hands.

In an outburst of virtual vigilantism, readers of blogs such as RottenNeighbor.com and hitsusa.com have listed the Drews' home address, personal phone numbers, e-mail addresses, and photos.

Dozens of people allegedly have called businesses that work with the Drew family's advertising booklet company and flooded the phone lines at the local Burlington Coat Factory, where Curt Drew reportedly works.

"I posted that - where Curt works. I'm not ashamed to admit that," said Trever Buckles, 40, whose two teenage boys grew up with Megan. "Why? Because there's never been any sense of remorse or public apology from the Drews, no 'maybe we made a mistake.' "

Local teenagers and residents protest steps from their tiny porch. A fake 911 call, claiming a man had been shot inside the Drew home, sent police to surround the one-story house. People drive by in the night, screaming "Murderer!"

The Drews, who have installed cameras to track neighbors' movements, declined to comment.

Cyber-bullying has become an increasingly creepy reality, where the anonymity of video games, message boards, and other online forums offers an outlet for taunts. Yet drawing the line between conduct that is illegal and constitutionally protected free speech can be difficult.

Parry Aftab, an Internet privacy lawyer and executive director of WiredSafety.org, points to one federal statute that might apply in the Meier case: the telecommunications harassment law. It prohibits people from anonymously using the Internet with the intent to annoy, abuse, threaten, or harass. Terri Dougherty, spokeswoman for the US attorney in St. Louis, declined to comment.

The mounting tension has community leaders worried. The St. Charles County Sheriff's Department, which rarely visited the suburb, now regularly patrols there. Prosecutors are reexamining the case.

more stories like thisThe city's board of aldermen unanimously passed a law that makes cyber-harassment a misdemeanor, with a maximum of 90 days in jail, a $500 fine, or both for each violation. It's the most stringent punishment available to the city.

"We're all in shock," Mayor Pam Fogarty said. "If I have anything to say about it, we'll never have our hands tied legally like this again."

Dardenne Prairie is an upper-middle-class enclave of about 7,400 people. Over the years, the flat expanse of farmland has been taken over by subdivisions, bistros, and strip-mall cafes.

Megan befriended Lori and Curt Drew's daughter in elementary school, and the two became close, Meier said. When Megan transferred to a different middle school last fall, to help her deal with her depression and get away from some bullies, the two girls grew apart, her parents said.

Around the same time, Megan started to use the Internet, under the supervision of her parents. The eighth-grader browsed through her friends' websites and chatted about school. When a boy messaged Megan on MySpace and asked to be friends, the girl excitedly agreed. The two talked online for about six weeks.

In October 2006, Josh told Megan he had heard she was a terrible friend. The two fought. Tina, who had to leave to take Megan's younger sister, Allison, to a doctor's appointment, ordered Megan to get off the computer.

She didn't.

The messages grew nasty, according to an FBI transcript. The final message isn't included in the transcript: "I remember it said something like, 'The world would be a better off place without you,' " said Ron Meier, 37, who works as a machinist.

That evening, as her parents were downstairs preparing for dinner, Megan wrapped a cloth cord around her neck and hanged herself in her closet. She died the following day.

In the weeks that followed, the Drews comforted the Meiers. They said nothing to them about the fake MySpace account.

They prayed at the wake and consoled sobbing community members at Megan's funeral. They invited the Meiers to birthday parties and had Allison over to bake holiday cookies. They asked the Meiers to help hide Christmas gifts in their garage, far from their own children's prying eyes.

Last Thanksgiving weekend, the Meiers learned the truth from a neighbor who had figured out that Lori Drew had conducted the online relationship with Megan. In a fit of rage, they hacked up one of the gifts they were storing - a foosball table - with an ax and sledgehammer. They dumped the pieces onto the Drews' driveway.

"I heard this god-awful screaming," said neighbor Kristie Kriss, 48. "It was Tina. When I heard what happened, I couldn't believe it."

Days later, when the Drews complained to the police about the loss of their foosball table, the truth became public.

According to a police report, Lori Drew said she "instigated and monitored" a fake account before Megan's suicide "for the sole purpose of communicating" with the girl.

The Meiers hired an attorney.

"We told our friends to trust the system and we would have our justice," said Ron Meier.

The neighborhood might have agreed to stay mum, but they couldn't keep their feelings hidden: Many people shunned the Drews, meeting their gaze with sneers and obscene gestures.

On the anniversary of Megan's death, Ron's relatives lined the street with balloons and put up signs that asked for "justice for Megan."

Meanwhile, the Meiers' marriage fell apart. Tina moved out this spring and lives with her mother. The couple is getting divorced. Allison, now 11, splits her time between the two.

Ron remained in the house on Waterford Crystal Drive and kept Megan's room exactly as it was before the suicide. Her clothes fill the closet. But he's stopped sleeping there.

His attorney has suggested that he spend the nights with friends or family, because "if something does happen to the Drews, I'm going to be the number one suspect and I'll need a witness to prove my innocence," Ron said.

"All we feel is frustration, anger," Kriss said. "For months, we've been asking ourselves, 'What mother in her right mind would do this? And why won't the cops do anything to punish them?'

"We just want them gone"

Girl's suicide after online chats leaves a town in shock - The Boston Globe
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  #2  
Old 11-27-2007, 12:40 PM
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  #3  
Old 11-27-2007, 01:12 PM
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The Child That Smelt Funny (David Firth '05)

Not relevant, just felt like showing it. I dunno, this just seems like social Darwinism, like we're supposed to feel sorry for someone who insists on going jogging in a minefield. It's shit that people are jerks, but people are jerks, so... I dunno, what?
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  #4  
Old 11-27-2007, 01:14 PM
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i read about this in the paper this weekend.
that's really fucking sick.

i think those motherfuckers deserve everything that they're getting and more.
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  #5  
Old 11-27-2007, 01:20 PM
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Originally Posted by Ophiel Ophiuci View Post
like we're supposed to feel sorry for someone who insists on going jogging in a minefield. It's shit that people are jerks, but people are jerks, so... I dunno, what?
she was 13 years old. i do feel sorry for her.

and yes people are jerks. however, grown adults that prey on a child causing her to commit suicide? i mean, there's not even words for that.
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  #6  
Old 11-27-2007, 01:21 PM
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Originally Posted by Ophiel Ophiuci View Post
The Child That Smelt Funny (David Firth '05)

Not relevant, just felt like showing it. I dunno, this just seems like social Darwinism, like we're supposed to feel sorry for someone who insists on going jogging in a minefield. It's shit that people are jerks, but people are jerks, so... I dunno, what?
David Firth is brilliant!I love Salad Fingers
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  #7  
Old 11-27-2007, 01:33 PM
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Maybe the whole bunch of them are retards. Like a rich real estate agent got an idea to put all the retards in one neighborhood or something. Then like juggled folks around so all the retards are in one spot.
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  #8  
Old 11-27-2007, 01:33 PM
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That woman will have to live with that for the rest of her life.
Some people are so incredibly stupid.
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  #9  
Old 11-27-2007, 02:03 PM
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It does lend weight to my argument that there should be an age restriction on the Internet though.
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Old 11-27-2007, 02:14 PM
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Originally Posted by Ophiel Ophiuci View Post
It does lend weight to my argument that there should be an age restriction on the Internet though.
this i agree with.
her parents should've been supervising that better.

i don't understand how parents don't realize this. my sister has two girls, 14 and 15, that are on myspace all the time and i'm the one that checks up on their pages, not her. she's clueless about their friends and what they're doing on there, and it makes me so angry.
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  #11  
Old 11-27-2007, 02:25 PM
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Originally Posted by Ophiel Ophiuci View Post
It does lend weight to my argument that there should be an age restriction on the Internet though.
I agree with this too. There should be a special kiddy internet that they can access (sp?) for homework/in school etc, but children should not be given free-reign on the internet.
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  #12  
Old 11-27-2007, 02:34 PM
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Megan Meier Police Reports - November 20, 2007

^ some of the police reports relating to the case.

I really hope they find a way to charge that woman. What she did was unbelievable.

I have a lot of empathy for that girl. I think what bothers me most is that the kid was only 13, she was still so young and probably naive. Messing around with somebody's feelings at that age, even the happiest of kids, is never particularly wise anyway. Throw depression into the mix, and it all starts looking outright irresponsible. I recall being thrown into a fair depression for about four years following the break-up of a short-lived relationship at that age (just shortly after turning 14 actually). I can't even imagine what I'd have been like if there was name-calling involved, but it could easily turned out like that, and I didn't even have a history of depression. I can totally understand how that girl reacted. The woman who did this ought to have had that in mind - the teen years are the worst for dealing with this sort of thing, even without existing mental problems.

I don't agree that a kid should have to take the good with the bad on the internet. It shouldn't have to be that way. This is probably kind of rich coming from someone on KR who thoroughly enjoys some of the arguments and baiting that occur on here, but the crucial difference is that we're old enough to take it here. That girl wasn't. That women should be held responsible, even if she didn't send that fateful final message. She made the account, she handed out the password to people (amongst them, probably some kids, who can be pretty cruel, especially towards someone they're not getting along with) and essentially gave an open invitation to wind the girl up. That's unacceptable.

This story makes me so sad. That girl could have been any of us, y'know? Thank god I didn't have the internet at that age. There needs to be a law, or some sort of protection, or threat of repercussions, against this sort of thing.

Wow.
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Deux hommes font une promenade amicale. L'un des deux porte un parapluie à son bras.
Il se met à pleuvoir. L'homme n'ouvre pas son parapluie et l'autre lui demande pourquoi.
- Parce que ça ne servirait à rien, lui répond son ami. Il est plein de trous.
- Alors, pourquoi l'as-tu pris?
- Parce que je ne pensais pas qu'il pleuvrait.

Last edited by Black Mambo : 11-27-2007 at 02:49 PM.
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  #13  
Old 11-27-2007, 02:37 PM
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For 6 weeks this adult woman pretended to be a teenage boy to this young girl. How creepy is that?
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Old 11-27-2007, 02:45 PM
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Re: the age restrictions thing. Yes, I sort of agree, but it's practically impossible to enforce such a thing. Above all, you're going to have parents who don't really care enough, or just don't understand the nature of the internet well enough, to really keep a grip on what their kids are doing. (and considering most teenage kids are smarter than their parents when it comes to technology, it starts to become pointless to even consider it - I used to babysit a kid of about 12 who knew well how to delete his browsing history and cache, how can a parent with the barest of sketchy knowledge hope to contend with that?)

I mean, this is a mother who had a pretty good grip on it. She and her husband were the only two with the password to Megan's account, she was aware that her daughter was talking to the 'boy', and there's no way that they could have foreseen something like that happening. I think they did all they could, short of actually standing over the girl's shoulder throughout her internet time.

What can you do? I just can't see how age restrictions would work. As with bloody everything, kids can and will find ways around it. If that's "jogging in a minefield" then fair enough, maybe it is, but they obviously need some protection in the law.

Bad analogy time: if a parent lets their 13yo kid outside somewhere to play, but doesn't keep an eye on the kid when they're outside, and the kid gets taunted by the mother of their former friend to the point where they come home in a fit of tears and hang themselves in their closet: should the kid never have been outside? should the parent have watched every minute of the kid playing? should the mother doing the taunting be held responsible?

It's a cruel world all round. It's not just the internet.
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Deux hommes font une promenade amicale. L'un des deux porte un parapluie à son bras.
Il se met à pleuvoir. L'homme n'ouvre pas son parapluie et l'autre lui demande pourquoi.
- Parce que ça ne servirait à rien, lui répond son ami. Il est plein de trous.
- Alors, pourquoi l'as-tu pris?
- Parce que je ne pensais pas qu'il pleuvrait.

Last edited by Black Mambo : 11-27-2007 at 02:52 PM. Reason: adding stuff
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  #15  
Old 11-27-2007, 02:48 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ophiel Ophiuci View Post
It does lend weight to my argument that there should be an age restriction on the Internet though.
Whattya mean? One of those parties was the PARENTS of another girl! I mean, shit like that happens here everyday! We've had teenagers vs. adults on KR since its inception.

I'm not sayin that I totally disagree. I just think that emotional instability isn't restricted to age, nor can age restrictions be contained. We'd just have to shut down the internet altogether for the sake of safety.

(I haven't read this entire thread, so, if I'm repeating anyone else, I apologize ahead of time)
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Old 11-27-2007, 03:03 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Black Mambo View Post
Re: the age restrictions thing. Yes, I sort of agree, but it's practically impossible to enforce such a thing. Above all, you're going to have parents who don't really care enough, or just don't understand the nature of the internet well enough, to really keep a grip on what their kids are doing. (and considering most teenage kids are smarter than their parents when it comes to technology, it starts to become pointless to even consider it - I used to babysit a kid of about 12 who knew well how to delete his browsing history and cache, how can a parent with the barest of sketchy knowledge hope to contend with that?)

I don't know, didn't we used to fear what we don't understand rather than just going "meh, I'll just pay way too much money for a safety thing that doesn't work and go watch reality TV perhaps" and leaving the kids to it?
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Old 11-27-2007, 03:07 PM
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Originally Posted by tracyr View Post
Whattya mean? One of those parties was the PARENTS of another girl! I mean, shit like that happens here everyday! We've had teenagers vs. adults on KR since its inception.

I'm not sayin that I totally disagree. I just think that emotional instability isn't restricted to age, nor can age restrictions be contained. We'd just have to shut down the internet altogether for the sake of safety.

(I haven't read this entire thread, so, if I'm repeating anyone else, I apologize ahead of time)
I'm thinking more the way age of consent laws work. OK, they're not perfect, and we don't all become masters of our own sexuality the second we hit 14/16/18/whenevs, but it does kinda set some kind of standard. I didn't mean segregating the Internet into kids and adults, I meant just not letting kids on unsupervised until they're old enough to know how to deal. It's like letting them wander off to some other town on their own every night.
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Old 11-27-2007, 03:43 PM
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