What a **** situation. Seems like you're doing a good job of keeping a clear head, I know it must be hard.
I've never had an abortion but many of my good friends have had the vacuum. One was pretty traumatised by it all, but she also never told a soul except her boyfriend of the time until a year later when she told me. A support system is very important so I'm happy to hear you have some good friends and of course some nice people on KR