okay real talk parent stuff confusion
all right so my mom died almost 4 yrs ago when i was 17
she had been sick since i was 5
i was an only child
i was just rummaging through this drawer trying to find my portable am/fm radio so i could listen to the radio before i went to bed
and i found an old journal of hers. which was weird because i use this drawer like literally every day and i had never seen this thing before
i felt really guilty reading it.
and i feel even more guilty talking about it but i just feel really weird about everything that i read
how do you think of your parents as people OUTSIDE the notion that they are your parents?
i mean, if you found out something, maybe shocking, maybe just unexpected, about one of your parents, what would you think?
obviously it doesn't change anything about me or her, and she will always be my mom who i loved (we were VERY close)
but i will think of her in a different way i think. and i don't know if that's for good or bad because maybe i should remember her how i knew her when i was little? but maybe it's good because i am getting a more complete version of the picture
anyway the journal only goes for about a month and ends the day she found out she was pregnant with me.
i would go into more detail but i doubt you care very much.
if anyone is interested i am willing to be specific
i just want your thoughts