How do you do this?

I tried to do it myself from random shit i had (KIND OF) remembered.

so i got some brown paper,
stuck it over my ear,
lit a candle,
and put the base of the candle on the paper bag. I KNOW - i had no idea either.

it didn't work, and i got hot wax on my face and on my top. GODDAMN.

i've also heard you can pour cooking oil in to dislodge wax, but there's no way i'm going to experiment with that. fuck getting cooking oil on my top.

i think i should just buy one of those ear candle things. hmm.

i've heard they're not that good and can remove too much wax.

my remedy is hydrogen peroxide. pour some in the ear, wait for it to stop foaming, then rinse it out. do this a few times a day, and the wax will work itself out.

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Raise the dead on your turntable.

hmm - okay i will try.
it's not like i have very waxy ears, but it sounds like having wax drawn up into a candle would feel heavenly.

I haven't actually had this done, but I've researched it because I really want to one day. From what I've read, you can go to a holistic doctor who practices ear candling, and after you go in for a couple of sessions, many of them will teach you how to do it on your own and tell you where to order the supplies from. I wouldn't try something like this on my own, knowing me I'd set my hair on fire and drip wax into my ear, LoL

go to the chemist and get Swim Ear.

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Well, it was no Goodburger.