Ok so I dated a guy who hardly made any time for me at all - was always ''busy'', hardly ever called and seemed to really care more about me sexually than emotionally... Everyone says he was a user. Yet I wanted him and still at times wish I could have had him SO BADLY. Now been on a few dates with a guy who seems to want to see me more and more, calls frequently and seems really into how I am emotionally......... yet I am not really in love/or lust. How is it that, like with junk food, one can desire what is bad for oneself more than what is seemingly good for you. I supppose it was that I had a long-term chrush on the first guy so the feelings were embedded there without knowing him too well. The second guy approached me and it went from there. With this guy though, things look like they're moving toward a good relationship together yet I don't feel head over heels...? I don't know... It seems silly to drop someone who seems to be good for me and who I do get on very well with.. yet I don't want to lead him on if my feelings never develop further. He is showing signs of wanting to be more than friends. How is it that someone who seems good for us and is there wanting us can be great but we just don't take to it the way we do someone who may not care/be bad for us but yet have so much more appeal?? Experiences? Thoughts?

Everyone wants what they can't have or if theres some kind of "challenge" involved.
If he really liked you you'd be here saying he was pissing you off i'll bet

In saying this i still understand.

Experience:-

I had a SUPER crush on someone for a year.
He did'nt give a fuck.
He eventually reconcidered & begain to give a fuck.

I was with him for nearly two years.
He cheated throughout with a yuck goth (omg i just realised where my hatred of lots of eyeliner came from) & was a prat leaving me with more than a few bruises.
Then chucked me for the yuck.

</3

The moral of the story is super crushes lead to you wasting 3+ years of yr life.
(3+ years cause i'm still crushing/ hating/ missing/ freaking BAD over it).

Thats the tale of lyrical's 1st love.

Seems the more you are in love when you start seeing someone, the less likely that anything great comes of the relationship... but from simple things better things may grow......

I think you should try and forget about the two of them. It's unfair on the second guy, because you're crazy about the first guy. I guess you could say you're emotionally "leading him on". Would you like it if someone started dating you despite being crazy another girl, just because you were nice / good for them? If I were that second guy, I'd just feel like a tool.
I don't know this guy you think you're in love with, but if he's only interested in you sexually then you're fooling yourself by going out with him. I hate guys like this, it sounds like he's manipulating you. Don't be a victim of manipulation. May I ask you what you love about him? Personally, I know my self-esteem would prevent from dating a guy who only liked me sexually.

You've found your "root". Progress!
Sad story, but.