Long distance relationship thread

[bookstore]

ignore my spelling mistakes. i am not a spelling and grammar obsessive. haha

[Black Mambo]

Haha, that pic is lol.

Idk, they say that absence makes the heart grow fonder and everything but I tended to find the opposite in my last LDR. With enough distance and time I'd forget the things that made me like that guy and everything. But I'd see him and I'd remember again.

Sort of weird to talk about it so I'll stop there.

Anyway, maybe you should try to arrange something at a neutral place just in case, since you're feeling so concerned about it? But I get the feeling your concerns will go away when you see him.

I assume he intends to lose weight again at some point? In any case, I don't think it's quite enough extra poundage to render him suddenly hideously unattractive if he was attractive before...


As for my LDR of the present, visitations came and went (fellow came to Scotland) and were so incredibly wonderful. But now I'm looking at as much as a year of not seeing fellow due to my schedule of uni. It's kind of depressing to really think about it. But I'm excited to make plans to see him again.

Things are still kinda new so I'm all girly and sappy and I love the feeling. I haven't felt so much this way ever before, and I haven't felt anything like it in a long time, so it's pretty exciting.

I have to say, when I look back at previous LDR and recall how we intended things to pan out for the future... even though I was hopeful about it, I always remember how I used to refer to it in terms of IF, and would refer to the possibility of breaking up as a matter of WHEN. I think that says everything about how I viewed the outlook of that situation, really.

And the difference now, although I grant you my head is clouded by "honeymoon stage" romantic notions and flowery happy ****, I actually believe that fellow and I will end up together after all of this long distance bull****. I really believe that.

Maybe I'm going to regret writing that at some stage but I find it hard to imagine.

[punksnotdead]

I don't know the whole story as I have only read this last post but..

Obviously you have some past relationship with this guy and liked/loved him enough to do the whole long distance thing. So even if you do not feel the same way about him when he gets back there must be a part of you that is really excited to have him back? I'd go to the airport and greet him, and if you don't like him anymore deal with that when you are certain. But you never know, you could see him and go 'weak at the knees'!

Good luck anyway!

[peterk]

Originally Posted by sssh

He'd made me keep an evening free, and it turned out that he'd ordered me a curry for a skype 'dinner date' - he got up at 3am dressed in his best clothes and made a curry for himself too.

Though, from my understanding, it seems that i am lost in translation this week, well, so it look like your relationship is on a downslide and won't last... i think it's normal. that's the harder part about LDR. As the Properce's proverb goes around for about more than 2000 yrs...
far from the eyes, far from the heart...
More you're out of touch of the loved one, more you'll see your love dissipate. It's not a matter of sex, it's only how human feeling goes.

i really need to remember what he had done with you for your birthday.
It is a sweet original, way to have an evening with someone far away!

I think people who are able to make a longtime ldr, it's because they want to believe in it and put alot of energy to keep the butterflies inside. Then, it becomes a hard games to play, because you don't want to over-love the other party. I mean, love him more than he does love you. Just in case, he don't believe that much in it and just don't give a damn.

[sssh]

HI GUYS

I just found out that Calvin Johnson is playing in York and got incredibly excited, then ten minutes later realised it's on the night my boyfriend comes back. So now I have to decide whether I like my boyfriend more than K records! Clearly boyfriend wins, but I want to whine about missing the gig and I can't whine about it to boyfriend/show off about how dedicated I am to him because then he will know of my secret plans, so I had to post on here. He will get fully whined at on the 6th about this, probably.

Thanks for the advice, I think I will probably choose to follow bookstore, black mambo and punksnotdead, I'd rather be optimistic. Black Mambo, I think you're very right about 'absence makes the heart grow fonder' being wrong. It seems like it's just been made up to make people in LDRs feel guilty all the time, for not acting how they're supposed to and pining all the time. When he'd just left, or when I'd just left Japan, it was like that, but you get used to people not being around (especially if you're in a different place to the one you were together in and have a different life) and as you say, you forget what it is you like about them a bit. But still... I got really excited at about 11 last night after realising that it's now less than three weeks until he's back (18 days!!!!!) and then I couldn't sleep.

The theme of this post is me not being able to control my excitement about things. Perhaps I should start going to yoga class to learn breathing exercises or something