That's what I did last night. We've been together for 2,5 years. He was my first serious boyfriend, I had all of my first times with him. We were together every day and we simply shared everything.

But the last few weeks or months (I don't even know because I've ignored if for so long) I began to feel that something was wrong. I couldn't tell him in his face how I loved him with all my heart. I would read old diary entries and just not feel the sincere feelings for him that I wrote down a year earlier. And last night when I was with him and he was getting a little intimate, I just knew that I couldn't do this anymore. It felt like I was betraying him. So we broke up.

And now it just feels sooo weird. I've been thinking about things that would change all day. If you spent your whole life with a boy for 2,5 years, it's such a huge change to not have that anymore.
I don't think it has completely sunk in though.

How do you deal with this? I've broke up with other boyfriends in the past, but none of them were such a big deal in my life, you know what I mean? My last boyfriend and I were so serious together...

You sound like you're doing alright, if you spent every day together for the past 2 and a half years as you say then of course it's going to be strange suddenly having loads of time on your hands. As long as you're happy with your decision spend time seeing your friends/family, do things you & your boyf never did together, get used to being single again!

Go wild now that you're single. Have fun with your friends, you'll get used to it.

Inferior Wine makes a good point, having fun with your friends is important. Don't just stay in your house afraid to do anything without this guy.

I think you did the right thing, btw

__________________
So I'm watching as his wings spread as wide as could be
Come on now and wrap them around me

I dated my first ever bf for 2 years and we broke off. I was so scared back then because I thought I couldn't live without him. Turns out it was for the better and I did live