I’m not really looking for a solution here (because I think the solution is therapy), but maybe some suggestions/advice?

Why is that when I find someone I am attracted to or maybe would like to date or become friends with, I instantly push them away? I become cold to them when I want to be just the opposite…warm and open. I have been this way for so long, and I hate it. I’ve pushed away some great people.

Is this something a therapist can help me with?

I've dealt with this, but it doesn't happen all the time. I've noticed I do it because I'm afraid if I open up and let my feelings out I'll end up getting really hurt. It's easier to put up a wall between you and the other person than opening yourself and showing your emotions.

I think the cure is letting go and not think of the outcome so much. Live in the present.

i do this a lot too. i am mean and horrible, belligerent, cold, sarcastic, and flippant. it's probably all about abandonment issues. BORING

and i notice that with people i am not interested in, i am fine and talk and i am open and all smiles. makes no sense.

you're just so esoteric