 iloveyoumovethefuckoutnowseeyoutmrw.
my relationship with my boyfriend is deteriorating since he moved in.
before this, every time i saw him was a treat and i'd feel more optimistic afterward.
since he moved in, we fight and i'm really really fucking exhausted and sad.
at first it was 95% good. i just missed my privacy sometimes. i was nervous and slightly resentful that i had to walk around without makeup and in my ugly jammies and such. then it was 85% good. i drank more, etc. to deal with the lack of privacy and space to think. then i started breaking stuff (including his guitars) when i drank, not being able to handle his bitchy comments. now he does something stupid every day.
i missed a package in the mail yesterday and he went to get it this morning. i didnt ask him to. i know its because he thinks it might be poppy pods. (i drink poppy pod tea to get high, so does he)
so I KNOW thats why hes getting it this morning, even though it could be something else i ordered. so he goes and they turn him down because hes not me, and when he gets back he gets angry because im not ready to go right then. because im straightening my hair and putting on makeup. "all you do is look in the mirror, literally!"
WELL LETS SEE. If i didnt do this, id have curly hair and wouldnt be as attractive so i fucking do it AND ITS THE MORNING TIME this is WHAT I DO IN THE MORNING TIME. I MISS NOT BEING WATCHED WHILE I DO IT.
He was not obligated to go there, i didnt ask him to. he then drives us there (we work int he same huge office building) before work without asking me if i wanted to, risking us being late. when i point out the fact its my fucking car and i didnt ask him to go to the post office in the first place, hes gets angry and tries to make me feel guilty for "taking me to get my package". "I have to do everything for you". He points out EVERY time i forget cigarettes or a lighter or leave something in my apartment or lose it. the apartments a godamn mess and im too tired to clean it.
He also wrecked my car. he was upset about a friend being shot and there was a spider in the car, and i was with him. the real issue is that before all of this and even after it happened whenever i said MY car he would get upset. "you use a lot of pronouns. most people in relationships share stuff if one of them doesnt have it". He even took my car without asking once, and i thought he stole it. HE DID STEAL IT. HE TOOK IT WHEN I TOLD HIM NOT TO. but APPARENTLY. it isnt STEALING. if he took it to go buy me beer and a card. RLY. some random white trash girl from my apt building saw me gaping after my car and she said "did he steal your car??? do you want me to chase him down???" and thus began my hour and a half long adventure with psychotic girl i just met.
I. cant. fucking. do. this. anymore. I need alone time. I need to be responsible for whats mine, but i really dont want to break up. because hes the only tolerable human i know ... im just not mature enough to handle living with someone yet or something.
i dont know how to tell him?
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gonna get my walkie talkie, and some mustard and some mayonnaise, and a mermaid, and some macaroni, bricks, and some telephone wires, and phone machines | 
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