After years of being a blackmetal boozehag and drinking nearly every weekend, I am too sick to continue this behaviour anymore. Unless I want to spend every weekend vomiting blood at least.

What I want to know is, what do people do to make friends that are not alcoholics? Even the people I know through band scenes are all into drinking and don't go out anywhere unless it is involving drinking.

I don't play sports but I do go to the gym, though I never talk to anyone there.

For the past month or so since I stopped drinking, I have been so utterly bored and alone, spending every weekend hanging out at home with nothing to do but watch dvds or go online.

I need ideas, for things to do, that don't involve booze or drugs.

Right now I am waiting for my guitarist to get back from overseas so we can finish our recording for one of our bands, I have a compressed nerve in my shoulder so I can't work on any music that involves playing an instrument. Shouldn't even be on the computer but I am so incredibly bored. All creative projects are at a stand still until I am able to use my left arm again.

Is it rude of me to think that my "friends" are boring because the only thing they ever do is drink? What do other people do on weekends?

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Juices like wine, like the blood in the sands.

i hear you.
the only 'friend' i had is an alcoholic and she turned on me and told me to kill myself.
i'm only on my 3rd day sober, but i can't afford to drink again, as my liver and espohagus are fucked.
do you have any pets? i'm thinking of getting a dog once i get a job because it gets so lonely in my apartment.
weekends for me are spent going online, listening to music and watching dvds or reading books.
alcoholics ARE BORING. all they do is talk shit and piss everyone off.
i'm going to do a pharmacy assistant course, so hopefully i can meet some non-alcies there.
i don't want to end up dead, and i've lost any true friends i had because of my drinking.

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When the glitter fades in the morning, turn away and you will find my empty eyes....your beauty blinds.

you can go on craig's list, under activity partners and find someone nice and sober to do things with and make new friends.

going on nature walks are very soothing, and good for your outlook on life, and yourself. doing that alone sometimes is good for focusing on your life.

even something like window shopping can be fun with the right person. i think solitude is your enemy at this time. a companion animal is a wonderful idea! they are the truest friends.

there's a lot to do, that most people won't do alone, like visit a museum, or go on a short trip. maybe take a train for a change, if you're used to driving. that's why i suggest craig's list. check out women for women- platonic only. there's nothing rude or that weird, imo, about asking someone you meet online if they are sober. just say that you are, and don't need the temptation right now.

i've had to stop seeing friends who got high in front of me and offered me free drugs, after i asked them not to. idk why speedfreaks are attracted to me. i'm so over that, but put some in front of me, and i might do it. even though the stuff now days is so much more impure, and it's a gamble i don't want to take.

when you go online, do it in a cafe, you could meet someone nice, and it's good to be around other people. it sounds like you need a change. being at home too much can be depressing.

Hmm I don't really do any sports... or find them interesting. I wish I did but I am just not like that. I'd probably kill myself if I tried to go rock climbing lol.

Jo, my stomach is fucked anyway so drinking just makes it worse. Last time I drank 2 beers I was vomiting for days. I have beer in the fridge and wine but I haven't dared to drink it for weeks.

Just annoying that if I ask my friends to come over here and watch movies or something they always say "sorry going out that night come out too" or they will only come if it's a drinking party. BACKkkk in the good old days, we didn't need to be drunk to talk to each other.

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Juices like wine, like the blood in the sands.

you can also go on gumtree.com.au and look in the friends section. some of them just want someone to go to the gym, or have coffee with.

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When the glitter fades in the morning, turn away and you will find my empty eyes....your beauty blinds.

no its not rude to think they are boring. yeah its tough to find friends that dont party all the time. its all i used to do when id go out. and its all most of my friends would want to do too. but now that i dont get fucked up on anything anymore...even alcohol i barely go out anymore either. but i go to aa meeting and na meetings and shit. you probably dont have that issue. so meet lots of sober people there.

I don't think I really need to go to AA or NA... since I can make myself sober. I guess it is the same as junkies not being able to give up cause all their friends are junkies.

Guess things will get better when my husband gets here and my band mate gets back.

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Juices like wine, like the blood in the sands.

I want to stop drinking but I find it hard because all I do when I go out is drink. Thats what the friends do. Im sure they wont care if I stopped for a while but I guess its peer pressure..which is the same for smoking.

Im not sure really. Could you try dance classes? or something like that.

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"I'm getting fucking tired of you fucks" - Trent Reznor - toronto 1994

I am the hate you try to hide and I control you - Mr Self-Destruct.

Wanna come over and watch Beverly Hills 90210?

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Juices like wine, like the blood in the sands.

Ugh, I hate it when people will only talk to you if they've been drinking. My phone accidentally rang sri wanker's number last night and he just rang me then and said he was drinking beer and he'll call me again next time he's drinking. wtf??????

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When the glitter fades in the morning, turn away and you will find my empty eyes....your beauty blinds.

what about companion animal? they are the best comfort, and can make you feel like a carefree kid.

a dog would be fun to go on walks with. you really meet a lot of people at a dog park.

what about a hobby like target practice? my mom used to shoot skeet (clay plates). and would practice shooting at the Beverly Hills gun club to meet a man "who can take care of himself, and me.".

i've only shot bow & arrow, but found it very satisfying. it can be theraputic to shoot a gun, if you're good at it. personally, i think they're obscene, and make me pysically ill. i'm just trying to help, with new ideas.

be good to yourself. best wishes.

I used to have my gun license but in my city you need a car to get to the gun ranges. It was good fun and also a good way to "let off some steam" shooting at targets. Hmm maybe my brother will take me.

As you know my dog just died. I live in a top floor apartment with a house mate that has two very annoying cats I don't think we should have anymore pets in here. I will get another dog someday but I think it is cruel keeping a dog in an apartment. In a few years when I live in a house again I will get a dog. Though I have a husband, who acts like a puppy sometimes. He is on the other side of the world right now.

Whingeeeeeeeeee.

Guess it comes down to the fact that I don't feel comfortable around many people at all when sober. If I go to someone's house I am usually trying to think of an excuse to go home. Weird but I can't explain it.

Maybe my problem is that there are people I want to hang out with but they live too far away. *glaring at Ruth*

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Juices like wine, like the blood in the sands.

i think i forgot about your dog, if i did know. forgive me.

atm, i can't think of anything else, i wish i could.

I'm sorry to inform you that alcohol is pretty much essential for making friends, unless you're some kind of social machine. And everyone secretly hates those kinds of people, so don't feel bad that you need alcohol.

I don't think you really got the post if that is your reply. I don't need alcohol, they do.. and they are boring now when I am sober.

I'm sure many people out there have friends that were not made through drinking alcohol. Just not sure what these people are doing.

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Juices like wine, like the blood in the sands.

Doesn't blackmetal culture go hand-in-hand w/ drinking by default? Maybe you need to associate yourself with a different "scene". Headbanging can't be good for pinched nerves, either. Basically I'm suggesting you join a commune and take up embroidery.

Not really black metal, but metal does in general. Go to concerts and get drunk. Yeah.......... I haven't been out headbanging for awhile Though even my other friends do similar things. I have 2 friends that don't drink at all. One won't go anywhere cause his car is broken and his mother is this really annoying jew that makes it horrible to visit his house, the other is a spoilt brat kind. I like her but she won't do anything that involves leaving her room... which is pretty small and once again mother hanging around.

My housemate has an embroidery kit on the coffee table for a sign that says "GO FUCK YOURSELF" with flowers around it. Maybe I could start that for her.

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Juices like wine, like the blood in the sands.

-learning foreign languages at a night class, or check places like meetup.com for get togethers in practicing that language. i think languages are better than writing or any of that shit because the focus is communication.
-more musical projects, do another wee side project, join someone's folk band
-maybe just start running like forest gump did and see if people follow you?
-movie clubs? I dunno, I think my local arty cinema has things where they watch a film and then discuss it.

erm, are you sure you can't just get on antibiotics and start drinking again?

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Would you like a cigarette? They're quite exellent.