hehe yeah a bit of a light hearted thread as a counterpoint to all the relationship trauma here.

Do you/how do you flirt? Do you consciously do it or does it just come naturally? Do you use "techniques"? Do you follow the advice of Tracey Cox and her ilk? (I think they're 99% full of shit)

Or are you like me, fairly hopeless

Discuss.

Well I always get told i'm flirting with guys when I haven't meant to, i've often been told i'm flirting with girls actually, haha. So I guess it comes naturally for me. However, the fact that I don't know when I'm doing it gets me into some sticky situations

i have no idea how to SERIOUSLY flirt....
i just say things like, i hope you will marry me one day..i think im falling in love with you..
so yeah...i dont ACTUALLY know what to do...because even if they play my game..i wont meet up with them after
BUT, after seeing a boy for the 3rd time and playing the same game, i MIGHT meet up with him because he got all serious and said he was sad i never wanted to see him just me and him
so now im freaking out because i actually have FORGOTTEN how to normally NORMALLY flirt
but you obviously dont know..so i dont even know what im TALKING about

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buy me some shoes any maybe take me for cola?

i'm a terrible flirt unless it's someon i know.

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I tend to insult people. I don't know why. It's a terrible way to flirt. But I think I'm funny. And even if it doesn't work as a chat up technique I'll get a laugh.

I don't think I flirt.
I'm one of those people that is friendly (it's always when I'm a bit drunk I pull no problem) but I always act very cool.
I think the boys I end up pulling are ones I'm interested in, but they are very confident so kiss me when I show a bit of interest in them (but not through flirting, maybe because I'm just dead talkative?!)

haha me too.. if i make fun of you, you know you're 'well in' as it were

yeah i generally suck at flirting

I'm hopeless.I always play it too cool,and they end up never knowing I fancy them.

no. not even slightly. I'm witty and charming and then get all knotted up, I need breaks from conversations. Plus I hate what passes for humour these days so I usually end up thinking about the conversation as a 3rd person and then getting all pessimistic.

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Would you like a cigarette? They're quite exellent.

Hmm yeah I can relate to that, if I'm talking to someone I like I tend to space out and then start thinking 're-group,RE-GROUP!!' If I could turn off my brain I might get on better.

The only time I can really live with myself is when I'm relaxed, happy and not really that bothered. The rest of the time I just cringe.

What I find really funny is all the flirting advice you see on TV and in magazines. I mean who actually follows that? If you go in with an elaborate gameplan surely you are at risk of drasticlly misjudging the situation.

It probably either comes naturally to me or doesn't come at all because I find the concept of flirting stupid and just can't be bovved with it. I like to be as genuine as I can with people.

what to ye all consider to be flirting?

I got no game

I'm great at meeting people but I'm crap at closing the deal. My 'game' seems to consist of flirting to the 75% mark, and then hovering until they kiss me or tell me to clear off.

I don't really believe in tricks or techniques at all, see the Neg Theory thread.

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His last request was a bulletproof vest or a god

i can flirt well but actully getting them to date me is kinda hard. like usualy they guy will ask me first but if I go after a guy, I suck lol

i am clueless about flirting, i think. sometimes people get the wrong idea, when i really did not mean anything in the first place. i am generally friendly with everyone, and i've had people tell me that i can be very sweet/charming. but that's about it..

one of my biggest problems is that, a lot of times, i have trouble picking up cues when other people flirt with me. i just assume that they are being friendly, and it isn't until afterwards when people tell me otherwise that i realize what was going on. this always makes me feel like an idiot.

I'm one of those that gets misjudged, I'm being friendly and its mistaken as flirty, that kind of thing.

I try not to flirt, I don't like the idea of flirting but I think I do it anyway without realising it sometimes, I just don't like the risk of sending out the wrong signal. Flirting in my eyes is kind of just a friendly gesture anyway, when it comes to someone I really like I can't remember what I do, I was dead shy when I started talking to my now boyfriend but I was also really young, I'd like to think I'd be more confident in serious flirtation now but I just don't need to.

im hopeless at flirting. so no, no game at all.
but i tend to semi-flirt with my friends A LOT, i wasn't aware that i did it until recently, but i don't think they know how to take it.
meh, i just think they're really lovely and deserve silly complimemts and stuff. ITS NOT AN ADVANCE

i guy said to me the other day 'if i werent taken i'd be groping you like a schoolgirl right now', to which i replied " *giggle* no, you probably wouldnt, *motions karate chop* i'm a blue belt"
i definitely have the anti flirting down.

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Maybe you could send him like a coat hanger or soup mix in the mail with a post it-
"when you paint with your eyes closed, you never become picasso, you just become an ironic narcissist with uncomfortable shades".
Throwing people off is thrilling.

-ktlr

i think i am basically pretty good at it when i want to be. i mostly end up kissing someone if i want to.

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Now honies play me close like butter played toast

Well. I am and always have been an incorrigible and totally (well mostly) harmless flirt.

I think people actually think I'm flirting when I'm not. I'm just being interested in what people have to say and shit like that. Plus I have these dreadfully instilled ingrained Southern manners, where you just aren't mean to people who are harmless and mean you no ill. Unless they turn into exasperating cunts in which time all bets are off.

My husband is just like "mmhmm, that's my wife; I'm antisocial and she's not, oh wells".

Good thing, that. Must say it took him a little while, tho.

Chyia, harmless (no, REALLY )

I crack onto the females at pretty much every party I attend, even while not single. It's basically compulsive. I really can't help it. But it's generally known that it's usually in jest, given that I'm in a relationship. I have had girls misread my signals and take it full-on seriously, to my utter bewilderment (i.e. when I'm not single and can't do anything with them), and I never quite realise it until they're trying to make out with me. I almost pulled my brother's girlfriend this way (they'd broken up for a while at this point) and that was, er, a bit of a 'mare.

I've never tried to extend my apparent flirting 'talents' to men. I think I'm a bit cagier with guys b/c it's a different thing. With girls I know I'm just having some banter and we might make out and such, whereas with guys it's more of a "shit, I need to do this properly so that he'll date me" and all that, so I'm not as brazen. I'm more about being myself in that situ.

In any case, given that some of my female friends years ago were collectively convinced that I was trying to steal all of their boyfriends, even though I was nothing more than simply friendly towards the guys, I'm guessing I don't really need to flirt, b/c guys are just gonna assume I'm trying to get into their pants anyway, whether I really am or not. It makes my work easy, I s'pose, but maybe I need to develop some proper 'game' so that guys can kinda differentiate between my friendly banter and my flirty banter.

This is probably why I've dated like 75% of all of the guys I've ever been friends with. I must be accidentally flirting with all of them.

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Deux hommes font une promenade amicale. L'un des deux porte un parapluie à son bras.
Il se met à pleuvoir. L'homme n'ouvre pas son parapluie et l