ok so im 18 and my boyfriend is 21. basically we see each other everynigth after work and most weekends. we've been going out for a couple of months. his mum is dead nice and always asks if i want to stay over. thing is my mum and dad are really fucking gay. im not allowed to stay at his as apaprently my dad has standards and i would dropping them. im guessing they assume we're having sex. but i'm 18 and it's not like im stupid. my mum was married and had me at 18 while my dad was working away. apparently so long as im 18 and under their roof its up to them whose house i stay at.

i sincerley think this is bullshit. i could understand them not wanting him to stay here as it's their house. all my friends with boyfriends are allowed to stay out and their bf stay over all the time. becuase it's normal

now tell me, should i fight this one? im really thinking YES. i pay a little bit of board everyweek and by rights i should be at uni now in my own place, but opted for a gap year.

what should i say
?

Tell then you are an adult paying rent to stay at there house and its none of there fucking business where you choose to sleep elsewhere.

do him on the dining table

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you'll go to hell for what your dirty mind is thinking

i don't think you have an argument.
if you choose to live at your parents home, you have to respect their rules.

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[ o ]==#

"A junkie is someone who uses their body to tell society that something is wrong.” - Stella Adler

i agree with this despite my other answer

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you'll go to hell for what your dirty mind is thinking

yeah i would never do something unless they said i could really.

basically theyve just come in and my dad shouted at me and says that ive got no self respect and that he's dissapointed in me and thinks that im gettin myself into a horrible family if they would even let me stay in his bed and he shouted and asked if we smoke pot. and he said ill end up in a council house or soemthing

im 18 just got aab in a-levels off to uni next september, got a ful time very good office job and have worked for my own money since ive been 15.

im sad at my dad

I am torn between Water and Cala's opinions but to be honest, if it was me, I'd tell them to fuck off.

Yeah your dad is a bit of an ass. Don't feel bad, he knows he's losing control and losing you because you're all grown up now and don't need him and the shouting is all he's got left.

og gosh he just came into apologise and got these baby pictures out of his wallet. fuck

anyways the story is they know their old fashioned they just dont wont let me yet.

so fair enough. not what i wanted but hey cant get everything i want

he will be like that anyway, he'll be seeing his wee girl growing up. I went through exactly the same thing but if you want treated like an adult you have to act like one. Tell him you are responsible and that he can trust you. I stayed at my bfriends long before he ever stayed at mine. When he started to stay at mine, he had to sleep in another bed for ages. It was out of respect for my parents too, suppose it comes from coming from a catholic family ( which is weird because none of us have been near a chapel in years ) ho hum.

Fair enough if you're not allowed to have him sleep round yours.

But you should be allowed to sleep round his house. You may live with your parents still, but you're an adult.

I'm eighteen in a few moths. My parents are really good with rules. They let me go out and stay out whenever i want. They provide me alcohol and stuff. The main rule in my house is that i don't disrespect them.

If you follow along with the rules for a couple more weeks without a fuss, they may change their minds because they will see you as matture enough not to argue about it. Don't hassle them about it.

If after months of being with this guy, and they still wont let you, do it anyway. You're 18 after all.

I think a bigger problem is that you're on a gap year and you're living at your parents and doing an office job! Get out there and live it!

Personally, I fought it. My parents sound similar to yours. They even took my car keys so that I couldn't go to his so I just walked straight out the door and got the bus. Had to put up with my Mum telling me I was a terrible person and then crying at me but you have to live your own life. I just talked it out with them and let them know that I have to make my own mistakes and that I didn't think this was one of them. I didn't get pregnant, I didn't get an STI, I just had fun waking up with my boy for 4 years before we split which prepare yourself, hurts.

The important thing to remember is that everything they say and do is because they love you and only want what's best for you. But at the same time they see you as their precious little girl and you have to grow up some time.

I think you should solve it by travelling the world but maybe that's running away from your problems - hell of a lot of fun mind!

Can I recommend Camp Leaders - flag and country selector This summer sure changed my life - no regrets! xx

i am planning on doing something this summer like that i wont be staying here all year

though i have to be here now to sort out some cw stuff which is no fault of my own. (my teacher fucked up majorly, which meant i didnt get 3 As and why im now on a gapyear)

i also need to buy my own car so am basically just working to get the money at a temping agency.

thanks for the advice tbh i dont think it will change in the near future and basially its not about sleeping over to have sex, as that isnt the problem, its nice to wake up and fall asleep with someone. the boys very understanding but like me doesnt get it quite.

my family are cool, its just this one thing which is a problem, i do what i want apart form that and drive around for free in their car.

I can understand them not wanting him to stay over (although if they charge you board, then you could argue you have tenants rights), however its frankly RUDE that they won't let you make your own choices with staying over at your boyfriends house. I say do it and tell your parents to just deal with it because you are 18 years old (which is waaaaaay over the age of consent), you are an adult and you have rights.

um yeah. thats bullshit.
my gramma still had some say over what i did at 18 but thats because i was also still in school.
other than that there should be no reason for them to be able to decide where you sleep at night. there is nothing worse than when parents try to shove their morals down their already grown kids throats. its just not right.

I agree that you should respect there word seeing as you do live under their roof, but then again you are 18 and should be able to go out and do what you want without them telling you not to. I dunno your old enough to stick up for yourself, if you want to stay over at his, do it.

if i was you id probably lie. lol.

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no no never say maybe to smack bunny baby again.

I don't think you have much choice. You have to either live with it or move out.

Threads like these only remind me of how normal other families are and how very, very screwed up mine is.

we've done this once. naughty naughty, it was lovely though hence why im so pissed off. i duno if ive mentioned stuff about my dad before but he is extrememly strict from a family naval background and was in charge of like a whole ship for most of his career. so ive had things put down my throat in every aspect.


bookstore would your parents let you stay out at a bf's? are my family weird?? becuase they are whn i look at my friends parents

i will stay over probably now and again when i woudl usually stay at a mates, but then again maybe not. bit rubbishy.


edit: and when i say lied i didnt do it on purpose, was guna stay at my mates but at about 5 in the morning as there wasnt really any more room to sleep, we went back to his and went to bed for a couple of hours and got up when his mum cooked us sunday dinner.