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09-18-2007, 04:41 PM
|  | bedroom revolutionary | | Join Date: May 2007 Location: Socialist Republic of Wales
Posts: 5,986
| | | Longdistance... So who is going to give me words of advice on how to cope with a long-distance relationship?
I've previously had trouble dealing with a relationship that was only cities apart, but this one's a whole other country. Arrgh...
Someone tell me nice happy-ending stories please!
__________________ We shall abolish the orgasm. Our neurologists are at work upon it now. There will be no loyalty, except loyalty towards the Party. | 
09-18-2007, 05:00 PM
|  | batwife | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: trapped in cabinets
Posts: 10,197
| | | i've been in a long distance relationship for 5 years, | 
09-18-2007, 05:08 PM
|  | EXTERMINATE. | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: aotearoa
Posts: 5,241
| | | don't even bother unless you know you're going to be able to see each other with something at least resembling regularity.
__________________
MAN FUCKS WOMAN. SUBJECT VERB OBJECT. | 
09-18-2007, 05:08 PM
|  | the figurehead | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: evidently chickentown
Posts: 1,118
| | I have posted about my kr romance thousands of times but I'll happily do it again. My bf and I are from different countries and have been together for over 5 years. We lived apart for ages, and it was hard and heart-breaking but in the end I managed to move here. The day I walked off the plane, knowing it wasn't just a holiday and I wouldn't have to go back time anytime soon was one of the happiest of my life, but also one of the saddest because I was leaving my whole life behind to start a new one miles and miles away from home.
Long distance relationships are not fun, but when the person is worth it they can almost become bearable. I think the question here is why your previous relationship did not work, although the distance was not huge. If you think that this time you have found someone who's worth investing your time, money and affection in, then go for it, otherwise I don't think it's worth the hassle.
I don't really have many suggestions on overcoming the sadness of it all, but shopping is a good alternative 
__________________
now that I know that I'm breaking to pieces
I'll pull out my heart and I'll feed it to anyone. | 
09-18-2007, 05:25 PM
|  | is pregnant!! | | Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: behind closed doors
Posts: 293
| | | My husband and I were long-distance for the first 2 years of our relationship. We saw each other about once a month whenever one of us has a long weekend or whatever.
Then we moved in together, and it was grand and I wondered how we ever lived apart, because we were two halves of the same soul.
Then we got married and it was just live living together, but with presents.
The end. | 
09-18-2007, 05:27 PM
|  | Registered Member | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Chicago/NYC
Posts: 1,564
| | | I dealt with a long distance relationship for a year, and then I ended up moving in with my boyfriend. I would never have a long distance relationship unless I knew we were going to move in together relatively soon, otherwise it's a waste of time.
While we had the long distance thing for a year, we would see eachother about every two months. In between visits the only way I could deal with the distance was by trying NOT to think about him, because thinking about him would just make me miss him and drive me crazy. So I tried to just focus on my everyday life until I would get to see him again. | 
09-18-2007, 05:29 PM
|  | laughingandgaylikeaclown? | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: the big top
Posts: 6,140
| | | if youre a sound and stable couple
and will be together one day then it will work!
i had a long distance for a year
and it worked for a bit
then it didnt
but thats because im not trusting and a mental bitch...and i was too immiture
but i strongly believe it can totally work!!!
i mean.. irekon i could have one now
if i trusted the person!
__________________ buy me some shoes any maybe take me for cola? | 
09-18-2007, 05:33 PM
|  | blah | | Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: London
Posts: 1,702
| | | Hmm. I had a long distance relationship once. Well, a relationship that became long distance after seven months. It wasn't massive distance. A couple of hundred miles. But big enough for it to RUIN EVERYTHING THREE MONTHS AFTER HE MOVED.
I hope I've helped. | 
09-18-2007, 05:58 PM
|  | duh! | | Join Date: May 2006 Location: Sao Paulo
Posts: 2,369
| | | I got married.
It took me a lot of drinking to deal with the long distance thing tho
but we were always focused on being together as soon as possible which we did | 
09-18-2007, 07:06 PM
|  | Hey!! A.G.G.R.O. | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Sweden
Posts: 1,594
| | | I'm very thankful for the distance between me and the new boy. I spent way too much time with my ex, even though he lived in another city. Even though it's easy for me to spend a lot of time with someone (if I get along well with them) and not get tired of them, I still know you have to be kept apart a bit, and I'm glad he doesn't live close, because then I would be with him right now, instead of having my own life, studying, seing other friends etc.
I came home from visiting him last night and before I went I didn't want to go, but when I got on the bus it felt nice. Sound.
In many relationships you think in the beginning that you'll not be like that, you won't become one of those boring couples that isolate themselves and don't get out much, but then you become like that anyway.
I like that I'll have my own, and he'll have his, and I can show him my world and I'll have both a city on the other side of sweden(where he is from) that I can go to and get to know, and also scotland(where he lives and studies), I look forward to having somewhere in another country where I can go on a regular basis and stuff. Opens up the world a little. | 
09-19-2007, 07:13 AM
|  | don't rape a goddess | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: catatonic planet
Posts: 679
| | | i'm in a long distance relationship myself and it kills me. we've been discussing about him moving here, but it's something that i can't see happening in the near future. sometimes i wonder if it's worth keeping this relationship going, because what's the point if we're going to see each other once every other month? i can't even call it a relationship. i don't know, i don't have any good advices to give to you. good luck and i hope it works out just fine! | 
09-19-2007, 07:19 AM
|  | Phil Goff | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Westport, New Zealand
Posts: 18,449
| | | I'm in long distance and it's hard, and I have to really fixate on the end result, moving in together and finally being in the same place. But I think he's the right one for me, so I persevere. Be prepared for it to be bloody hard, and for clear communication to get hellishly difficult in the times when it is hard. Soldier on.
__________________ Time is the distance that you can't return by miles.
I escaped somehow. Let's go actualy [sic] I have quite a blessed life if I'm honest. I have many people to love, hate few and have few money problem's [sic].... What more does a person need? Oh yeah and I have some kind of humbleness unlike you of course ^_^ ~ CarefulCarpenter | 
09-19-2007, 03:26 PM
|  | bedroom revolutionary | | Join Date: May 2007 Location: Socialist Republic of Wales
Posts: 5,986
| | | -=is soldiering=-
We're both in education, so he's tied to where he is for another 2 years, and me for another four. The news that Easyjet are considering expanding to his country makes us both very happy.
__________________ We shall abolish the orgasm. Our neurologists are at work upon it now. There will be no loyalty, except loyalty towards the Party. | 
09-19-2007, 03:32 PM
|  | I ARE MASTER | | Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 5,269
| | | im in one of these currently as well.
i love my christopher so much but lately ive been a little freaked out about the whole thing because i wonder if we're gonna live in different states forever. i hate not being able to see him whenever i want. and this once every four months shit is driving me up the wall. ofcourse im not gonna bring any of that up because itll just frustrate both of us if i do. i just wonder if he ever plans to move in together or anything like that. :-/ i hate not being with him. | 
09-19-2007, 04:29 PM
|  | the figurehead | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: evidently chickentown
Posts: 1,118
| | Quote:
Originally Posted by Amity -=is soldiering=-
We're both in education, so he's tied to where he is for another 2 years, and me for another four. The news that Easyjet are considering expanding to his country makes us both very happy. | Omg low cost flights to Israel (that's where he's from, isn't it?) would be awesome, but surely there would be a big safety issue?
__________________
now that I know that I'm breaking to pieces
I'll pull out my heart and I'll feed it to anyone. | 
09-19-2007, 07:39 PM
|  | bedroom revolutionary | | Join Date: May 2007 Location: Socialist Republic of Wales
Posts: 5,986
| | | Yeah, that's why nothing's been decided yet. They don't know if the costs of the security measures are worth it - getting in and out of Israel is notoriously arduous.
__________________ We shall abolish the orgasm. Our neurologists are at work upon it now. There will be no loyalty, except loyalty towards the Party. | 
09-19-2007, 08:55 PM
|  | duh! | | Join Date: May 2006 Location: Sao Paulo
Posts: 2,369
| | | just get married | 
09-19-2007, 09:39 PM
|  | bedroom revolutionary | | Join Date: May 2007 Location: Socialist Republic of Wales
Posts: 5,986
| | Quote:
Originally Posted by Mallory Knox just get married | Haha, so he/I can get citizenship and move? We're not starcrossed lovers, we're being more sensible than that. He's worked hard to get where he is, and I'm hellbent on getting my degree, so I don't think either of us are going anywhere anytime soon.
__________________ We shall abolish the orgasm. Our neurologists are at work upon it now. There will be no loyalty, except loyalty towards the Party. | 
09-19-2007, 09:53 PM
|  | Part-time narcoleptic | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Oxford and London, of the cold old UK
Posts: 2,617
| | | After a year and a half, my old relationship went long-distance (a couple of hundred miles). Even though we saw each other weekly, it pretty much ruined the relationship and even when he moved to be with me, it was pretty much all downhill from then on. So I am not a mah-issive fan of them. | 
09-20-2007, 08:27 AM
|  | duh! | | Join Date: May 2006 Location: Sao Paulo
Posts: 2,369
| | |