My boyfriend has not called me in 2 days now...it's like I don't even exist. I called him Tuesday night and he did not return my call. Yesterday was the start of Jewish New Year- a phone call or e-mail would have been nice, just to let me know he cares. Something, anything.

I know he is busy with work, as he just started a few weeks ago and he is lawyer so it is intense, but honestly is that hard to give up one minute of your day to make a quick phone call?

I need help, guys- any advice you can give me would be great. I REALLY like this guy and don't want to lose him.

Thanks friends!

He's just not that into you.

stop smothering him for a start

how long have you been with your "boyfriend"?

calling him once is smothering him?? I think it's showing I care...

If he is a workaholic this could definately be your answer as to why he hasn't made the time to call you.

I hate when men are so busy at work that they can't even bother to send you a quick e-mail or give you a call to see how you are doing or to tell you they love you or are thinking about you. I think any man that says they are too busy to do that is full of shit. My mother's ex was like that. My fiance always manages to at least send me a text to see how I am doing and to tell me he loves me, even if it is just one text.

I'd say call him and see what he says. Two days is a long time for a boyfriend not to call and see how you are doing. Someone who was really into you would wonder how you were doing, despite shit loads of work. At least that is how I am, and what I think.

if its been two days and thats not normal he must call you every day?!?!? You won't find answers here. I'm sure you'll find your answer when you get to talk to him again. Here is only good for venting and bitching until that time.

Thank you...finally a really good piece of advice...

and I already did call him once...once in 2 days is not crazy...and he didn't return my call.

maybe wait and see how long it takes for him to get back to you?
he may have a really good excuse.

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Said Hamlet to Ophelia,
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2B or not 2B?

Possibly he is really busy with work...but honestly is it that hard to take a minute out of your day to make a quick phone call?

men sense the need for emails/calls/texts and get stroppy about it, refusing on principle

Two days isn't really that long. If he hasn't called you for a week then I could see how that might be a cause for concern. But two days is nothing. Maybe he is genuinely busy with work. Not all couples talk on the phone every single day.

Are you sure he's actually your boyfriend? Might be worth checking.

If yes, as I'm sure loads of people will already have said, it's not that unusual not to be in touch for two whole days. People in relationships need to allow each other space, particularly in the early stages of something which you hope will go further. I know a few days can seem like forever, and this is why things like the three day rule exist, to help us overcome that.

My advice: wait for him to get in touch with you. Wait at least a week. There's a fair chance he'll be in touch.

Also, pre-emptive suggestion: if you arrange to do something one time and something comes up at the last minute and he can't do it, this does NOT mean he is cheating on you or that he hates you.

It's not that it's hard. It's more that it's not a very long time to wait between calls to someone. I mean, are you actually going to have anything new to talk about? Because dudes very often call to ask you to go out or whatever, but we don't tend to phone people up just to talk or to make like we're hanging out. Some do, but the fact that he hasn't isn't that surprising really.

They're not too busy. They say they're too busy because it sounds better that saying that it just didn't really occur to them. Maybe you should tell them you're insecure more often.

No it isn't.

Probably yes. Would they then immediately phone up to find out? Probably not.

My ex-boyfriend was like this, except that for 6 weeks I'd have to text him twice before he'd reply, and then I'd get a two or three word answer. Before that he wanted to talk to me all the time, we saw eachother all the time, but I guess he just lost interest. Meh.

honestly, yes. well tbh, it's only that hard if I don't really care about talking to that person. this doesn't mean I don't care about them, just that I have honestly been so busy at times that making a phone call is not going to happen. it could be a quick phone call, but it's more likely that then the other person would make me feel guilty for not wanting to talk longer and I just don't need that kind of shit when I'm that busy.

Even though I just said what I did, I think it may be the case here. To not call someone out of the blue when you're busy is understandable but to not call someone back after they've called you is less forgiveable imo. I suppose if it's really important they'll call back again but particularly if it's your bf, I don't understand why he couldn't call back and say he's busy and if it's not important then get off the phone with you. Maybe he just trusts you'll call back if it's important or maybe he just doesn't care, it could be either. Or less likely- maybe his phone wasn't working or something, is it a cell? if it's cingular then that's a shitty phone company and I've gotten 5 messages all at once 3 days after they were originally sent and stuff like that.

wrt the first part, I'm not a man and I'm not full of shit, I just don't like the phone unless someone is out of town. I know that lots of people can't relate to the concept of being so busy that making a phone call isn't an option but I have to prioritize when I'm pressed for time. if the choice is between me taking a shower/having 5 minutes to myself and calling someone who should know how damn busy I am anyway, guess which one I'm going to do?
Christ I'm so not cut out to be in a relationship.

wrt to the second part, just because I don't call someone doesn't mean I'm not wondering how they're doing. but I still think it's a possibility here that he's not that into her.

this is probably key. did you guys previously talk on the phone everyday?
I still think it's weird to not call someone back though. Unless (1) this relationship is very new and you're not really bf/gf or (2) you've been in the relationship a while and he knows the thread starter is only calling to say hi and/or assumes she'll call back if it's really important. I still think that would be kind of rude though, esp. if it's your gf.

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