does anyone else find it just impossible to have a serious heart felt conversation with your bf/gf? it's not even that he doesn't want to talk about anything like that (although i must admit, he might not be the MOST receptive to a chat like that, but what man is, really), it's more that i can't muster up the guts to even talk about sensitive things like that.

i just can't even spit out my feelings. i feel too awkward! it's like that "i have to be tough all the time" thing, but like, it's getting pretty ridiculous.

am i the only one who has troubles talking about their feelings towards their significant other?

If you're having this probelm, maybe you shouldn't be in this relationship. People in relationships should be able to have serious, heartfelt conversations with each other. Do you feel he might ridicule you for your sensitivity? There must be a reason why you feel awkward talking to him about your feelings, so consider if he makes you feel ashamed of having them.

no, it's not him. i'm not scared of his reaction or worried he might ridicule me, not at all. it's more of a personal thing. like for example, for me to tell my dad that i appreciate everything he's done for me in his lifetime and i think he's awesome despite any troubles we've had, etc,... yeah i could never do that either.

why??

My husband hates heart felt conversations. Maybe he is like you, it´s so hard for him to express his feelings, like he has to be tough all the time, I don´t know. All I know is that he gets mad, and we usually fight for days until he realizes we should have a conversation, which he is always avoiding, pisses me off.

yeah i'm like that too, see i guess i'm more like the typical guy in that way, willing to do anything to avoid talking about "feelings" haha. but i just wonder why. like guys are raised in a lot of cases to be all macho and not show their feelings... maybe for me it's more of a defense mechanism or something. but i just feel SO STUPID talking about stuff like that. and like what i want to say is on the tip of my tongue, but i can't get it out. it's so annoying.

He does it, when HE feels like it...never when I say, "We need to talk." Most of the time it takes an outburst before we go there, but for the more sentimental twaddle....its only occasionally out of the blue.

I was going to say that I agree with desdemona, until you said that it's these kind of talks you're referring to. I can't say things like that (at least with a straight face) either, and I don't like them being said to me. I'd rather show and be shown appreciation by how we treat each other?

*feels a chorus of more that words coming on*

I can talk to my bf about whatever I want. I can't however talk to my family about anything. Its impossible! Its too hard and I feel ridiculous even trying.

I always used father's day cards and my dad's birthday cards to vent feelings. Me saying words to family always makes me feel retarded.

Yeah I definitely have that. I would generally rather die then tell someone my sentiments- even family. This issue has not been helped by me telling my (now ex-) boyfriend I was feeling pretty depressed about things and him turning round a few weeks later and saying I was boring and tiring to be around because of it.

okay well at least i know i'm not alone now.

Yup, there is a definitely subset of emotional cripples out there of which I proudly present myself as one.

Yes, I feel you because my boyfriend "doesn't have emotional feelings." Whatever the fuck that means. He acts like he's of some high intellectual class from Mars and I'm on some little ass island with a bunch of cavemen.

lol!!

I can talk to my bf about anything. He wants me to be completely open, and he says he likes it when I confide in him because it brings us closer. However, he rarely tells me much. I can usually tell if there's something wrong though, and eventually I'll guess what it is and we'll talk about it and I'll help if I can.

Mind you, it wasn't like this from the start. It took a while before he opened up to me, and it took some time before I trusted him (I don't trust people easily). Maybe you need to just give it some time? Get to know each other more. Leave it for a while. It'll come eventually.

In the meantime you can always show him that you love him by just being there for him and being supportive.

I am open and he doesn´t mind that but he thinks he doesn´t have to be. I´m sure he wouldn´t mind if I was open and kept things to myself. Less stuff for him to worry about right?

tbh, i don't really find it that hard to talk to my boyfriend about my feelings. he's pretty straight up about stuff so i always get an honest response and he doesn't get freaked out about the serious stuff. in fact, he says the serious stuff all the time...

it's good. i've been in relationships where i've gotten my head bitten off every time i've opened my mouth and i'm so glad it's not like that anymore.

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My boyfriend and I broke up last month but are still pretty close I guess and yes, he is extremely hard to talk to because he NEVER talks about how he feels and always tries to be tough or whatever... it's frustrating.

I can't do it.
I get really awkward and make jokes or comments to kill the mood.
I also don't understand how to take a compliment.

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Diving for pearls.

I want a lolly.

"those" conversations are boring. Just fuck the pain away.