just want some opinions - pro, con, whatever.


would you, have you, etc. etc.

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i probably would/will because i hate my last name. it's polish and too hard to pronounce.

I have such surname pride, I don't think I'd want to.

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Now honies play me close like butter played toast

we've been arguing lately because I originally said I would but then changed my mind.

I like my name, I like being Mrs X because it reminds me of my mum. I said so and why wouldn't he take my name and he got all angst because that's not how it works and we're not giving them grandkids so he doesn't want to take away his parents name and we're not having kids so he's the last and there's nobody to carry on the name....

frankly I think that's a ridiculous argument - every thing he's said about why I should take his name is equally an argument as to why I should keep mine.

there is no Mrs X anymore, my mother's gone and my sister changed her name. I like being Mrs X. I don't see how it's so insulting that I should want to keep my own name, I'm wearing a wedding ring, it's not as though I'm not Mrs and people don't know I'm married or something.

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haha - the misters name is ALWAYS misspelled or misspronounced. Mine's EASY.

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Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room.

if i ever got married i would keep my own surname. like debbie mcgee.

pros - there is less chance of you ever being referred to as, "mr & mrs [husband's name]." if you ever get divorced, there'll be less bureaucratic hassle for you. and... well. what does it matter, really?

My boyfriend’s is so hard to pronounce that his entire family actually answers to ‘Um….uh….’ Mine is easily pronounced, but so freakish that people garble it on purpose, assuming it can’t really be my name and I’ll be mad if they say it that way. So if we ever do make it legal (today is our 13th anniversary, so obviously we’re in no hurry there), I’m keeping the lousy last name I’ve had all my life. I probably wouldn’t change it for a normal name either, although I might be more tempted.

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it depends what their surname was. if it was nice and sounded okay with my other names i would. if it was horrible i would prefer to keep my own.

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no no never say maybe to smack bunny baby again.

do you think he'd expect that you'd change it though?

I think our issue is that I said I would, then didn't. I say I'm allowed to change my mind, I never thought I cared that much until I did. My passport and visa (I'm Cdn he's British) are in my name, it'd be a pain in the ass to change them from overseas, which is part of it, but then it comes down to my mother which I'd hope he could understand but his pride seems to be blocking it.

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i refuse to change my surname. it's mine. why should i? i don't see why any woman should have to, you aren't a possession. you both have histories & families & you should honour those if you wish to. i'd rather either just both have our own names or both go double barrelled. that's cute. that's love.

the mere mention of him having to change his name sent him crazy this weekend. I was just trying to make the point but he went all nutso. you know his last name, hyphenating would be a little much and it would take like an hour to sign documents.

I am not CHATTLE. I like my name, I like being mrs x because whenever I hear it I'm reminded of my mother. it's not that I don't love him I just don't see why I should have to change my name. the ring is on, the papers are signed, hell I moved across the fricking ocean to be here I don't see why my keeping my name is such a big deal.

my father's new wife has it even worse, she's got a pretty prestigious job and career history with her first husband's last name. now she's married my dad and she's like 60 or something. I laugh when I call hotels to find they're booked in her name, or rather, her first husband's name.

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Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room.

i'm with you on this one it's your name. i guess he's annoyed because he's thought you would take his, though? so there was probably no need to even have this discussion as you hadn't discussed the possibility that you might not want to take it... i know my boyfriend really really would want me to take his name if we get married. but he knows that i won't unless it's both double barrelled, so he's just going to have to deal with it.

but it's your name. nobody has a leg to stand on when they say you must change your name. you must do what you wish. that's all you must do at all.

I wouldn't take my current boyfriend's name if we were to get married, because he has an Arabic last name and me being English and Irish and having an Irish last name, being Mrs [Arabic last name] wouldn't mean anything to me or my heratige. If I was marrying someone with an English or Irish name, I don't know.

same. well, not exactly pride but i just like the way it sounds. no, i don't think i'd ever change.

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then she dances skirt swaying in the half-light she dances white blossom in the black sky
'I need new clothes', she thinks, 'new skin, a mind I can bear to live in'.

I would go down the double-barrelled route and have both surnames... Haha.

I always write my surname, never his. I don't like his at all, its awful!
I think unless it was some sort of legal document would I ever write it for my surname.

My surname is AWESOME! I would never change it (even though people always spell it wrong).

On the pro-side of name changing though, people will always assume you are called Mrs His surname and it probably gets really annoying correcting people all the time.

No i wouldnt. I've had my name for 31 years and dont see the need to change it because of a man. Also im the last unmarried in a family of all daughters, so once my daddy goes, so does the name - unless i carry it on .

i'm not married. don't have the plans to be. my choice.
we're together, we have a child. i even gave her my last name.

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