i'm 22, i've only had 3 boyfriends in my life. the first meant very little, the second was an abusive psycho and later stalker, and this one i have now is where i need advice. because of my last relationship, it's hard for me to desipher what is normal and what is unacceptable.
he's 30..he's a great caring person. but he has this wierd honesty, that HURTS me a lot and he knows it does and continues to hurt me. for example, he points at girls and says "she has a nice ass". whenever i talk about a girl i know, he asks "is she hot". he tells me i'm fat, then he justifies is by telling me that he's trying to make me feel better about myself. he says how crazy hot my friends are.
it is really hurtful...is this normal guy stuff?? is he a complete asshole? am i just being silly??

What the fuck are you doing with him? Do you not like yourself? Say awful stuff back to him.

He's an asshole. You need to work on loving yourself more, people that love themselves don't let people like that say things like that to them. Please do something about this before you end up feeling even more traumatised.

Yep, he sounds pretty much like an asshole to me.

See under normal circumstances I would say that this is a total assholeish thing to do but when I was 20 I had only had one boyfriend in my whole life (sounds a bit like your second one ) then I met my current boyfriend and he almost sounds similar to your current one. He is always saying how hot random girls are in the street and he is very brutally honest but as you say i just say stuff back. He's done a good thing for me, he's made me less untight about things. Try saying you'd do one of his friends see how he reacts it's usually all just laughs where I am This is the way I feel about it if I look at a girl in the street and I think shes attractive what's to stop him from saying it as he's a man and controlled by his penis lol :P

ok this is ALL WRONG
all all wrong
he is not good
would you ever say that to your boyfriend? i wouldnt? its just completly rude

so yes, get rid of him and find yourself a lovely new one

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buy me some shoes any maybe take me for cola?

Yeah, but does your boyfriend tell you you're fat?

Sounds like a very insecure man himself, projecting his insecurites on you. Also trying to mold you into physical perfection by making you feel fat and wanting to do better for yourself. If you were obviously obese maybe there was a small point albeit a very nasty way of going about it but if you think you are healthy with a harmless extra few pounds and happy in yourself you need to dump his butt already....he will bring down your self esteem. Im no way near thin but Id definitely would not put up with that myself.

No it's not normal. He's being a complete asshole and if I were you I'd tell him to go fuck himself.

not normal.
i'd kill my boyfriend if he acted like that to me.

I can't believe you're asking if this is normal. At 22 you surely have at least known other people with loving relationships even if you haven't experienced one yourself?

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"We believe that the best of America is in these small towns that we get to visit, and in these wonderful little pockets of what I call the real America, being here with all of you hard-working, very patriotic, very pro-America areas of this great nation," she told the crowd.

thanks everyone. i'm embarassed to tell anyone that he says this stuff to me, like my friends, and my family. cause deep down i know it can't be right.

but like i said, my idea of normal is really messed cause of my last boyfriend.

i understand this.
i went through a string of abusive relationships before i landed in a normal one and it was a struggle to adjust.
however.
when somebody says things like that to you. surely you must have some idea that it's not okay? i mean you must've, because you made the thread.

ew gross Have some self-worth and get rid of him asap!

also you really need to break this cycle being with men who are abusive. Some women don't even realize they have a pattern of dating men like this. The way to do this like someone else mentioned, is to learn to love yourself.

it's BAD MANNERS

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you'll go to hell for what your dirty mind is thinking

it really is very bad manners.
just do it back.
what are his flaws please and can you also please tell us about his hot friends or some men you know that are hot?
I will give you some good advice then.

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Now honies play me close like butter played toast

How could you think this is normal? Surely even at your age and experience, you know that a loving relationship is supposed to be just that...loving. He's not supposed to be criticizing you, checking out other women and making you feel like crap. That's just common sense.

I wasn't saying its normal or right for him to call her fat, I was just saying that i know 100% that my bf loves me to the ends of the earth and that he would do anything for me we just call each other names all the time and act silly round one another. I just wondered if that was the case or not...if he is a genuine asshole then dump him straight away just is there a chance you are being oversensitive or is he genuinely a nasty person you should know from the behaviours of the second one

you obviously know that is not normal or nice behaviour of a boyfriend or you wouldn't have made this thread, your boyfriend is supposd to make you feel good about yourelf, not crap, tell him to go fuck himself.