so i was with my boyfriend 18 months and we were honestly REALLY happy. like... it really seemed perfect, we never argued or anything.

anyway, he wanted me to be in a film he's making but i was shy acting in front of him, and he kicked off saying that when he fails it'll be my fault cos i was shy acting. despite him saying two days before "if you cant do it dont worry at all its not a problem" - i never said i couldnt do it, just that i was shy.

anyway, he didnt speak to me at all and we went to a friends house party seperately. i asked him for a word and said "look, do you just want to split up cos you're really acting like you do", and with that he had his hands round my throat, spat in my face and promptly punched me.

and now i'm really in shock. he spent last night playing strip poker with a bunch of girls while i had a bloody nose. and i arent having it, i arent going back to him at all. but it's hard because i NEVER expected that from him. ever.

its hard not to text him and say i wanna sort things out but i know i'm worth more. ha. anyway. i need things to do that are productive and take my mind off him. ideas anyone?

also the number of a hitman in hull would be appreciated. =]

was it a porno film?

he fucking punched you!??? are you JOKING?

aha no. horror.

he sounds like a full on LOON becky, that must feel so weird after everything being cool. do you know his phone number off by heart? delete it if you don't. have you got a mate to sit round watching films with or to go out and get drunk with to distract yourself?

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Now honies play me close like butter played toast

sadly no. and it was last thing i ever expected him to do. he was running round shouting "SHE'S A FUCKING PSYCHO YOU ALL TAKE HER SIDE COS SHE'S GOT A CUNT" and then his friend locked him in his car to keep him away. ha.

thats the thing i do know it but ive deleted his number and photos and things so i'm less tempted. im gonna try and do overtime at work this week, and catch up on my law work and stuff. eh.

i can't believe that you are typing as though him punching you isn't a big deal! what did people do when he did that? has he apologised?

you added it your post THANKGOD i was beginning to feel dramatic.

Yikes! What a freak. Run far away, and carry protection.
I'm chanting for his destruction.

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Time is the distance that you can't return by miles.

I escaped somehow. Let's go

actualy [sic] I have quite a blessed life if I'm honest. I have many people to love, hate few and have few money problem's [sic].... What more does a person need? Oh yeah and I have some kind of humbleness unlike you of course ^_^ ~ CarefulCarpenter

it is the biggest deal in the world to me but if i try and laugh about it i feel a bit stronger. if i sit crying i'll feel pathetic and get annoyed at myself so i'd rather just act like he doesnt matter. he did it in a seperate room so noone saw but i was crying and had a bloody nose so. they dragged him outside and locked him in the car and then ignored him screaming at them through the car window.

Is there someone else you can go and sleep with? I always find that that helps.
completely ignore him. Do you think he has somehting wrong with him? do you know any of his other exes?

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Now honies play me close like butter played toast

and no, he hasnt apologised. two of the girls there lois and tiff went up to him and said "you were REALLY out of order, you need to go apologise to her right now" and he just said "i dont give a shit".

so if he doesnt give a shit, neither do i. im not wasting my breath on him.

he had one girlfriend before me who is weird and i dont speak to her. i think he might actually have something wrong because he used to go into little crying fits over nothing.

what a fucking jerk. did you at least try and kick him in the balls? did going to the police seem like an idea at the time? i hope it gets around that he beats girls. just shows you no matter how long you know someone you can never fully know them, ya know.

i like your approach though, deleting and throwing out. i always do that once i don't wish to have someone in my life anymore.

maybe you could make collages, or draw stick figures, clean? rent childhood movies and get drunk with your friends?

That's the approach I'd recommend. Don't dwell. Some say that approach is unhealthy, but I think it can really work, both for me and for other people I know.

__________________
Time is the distance that you can't return by miles.

I escaped somehow. Let's go

actualy [sic] I have quite a blessed life if I'm honest. I have many people to love, hate few and have few money problem's [sic].... What more does a person need? Oh yeah and I have some kind of humbleness unlike you of course ^_^ ~ CarefulCarpenter

weird in what way? I say go out and get VERY drunk.

__________________
Now honies play me close like butter played toast

OMG Long Island Iced Tea!

__________________
Time is the distance that you can't return by miles.

I escaped somehow. Let's go

actualy [sic] I have quite a blessed life if I'm honest. I have many people to love, hate few and have few money problem's [sic].... What more does a person need? Oh yeah and I have some kind of humbleness unlike you of course ^_^ ~ CarefulCarpenter

i was wrecked last night drinking doesnt appeal right now haha. but my friend wants me to go to bridlington tonight to watch a band so i might do that.

i wanted to hit him back but at the time i was in complete and utter shock so i just ran. he's just a strange person. like he doesnt really have friends, he just tags along with all my friends, its only recently he's actually made some friends of his own.

i think drawing would be a good idea, i just really wanna keep busy.

oh. oh. oh. i just remembered i have a CLASSIC mp3 on here - him attempting to sing fake plastic trees. and trust me, its not good.

i'm tempted to circulate it