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12-15-2006, 09:48 PM
| | meaning is the old black | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: circa 1996
Posts: 1,404
| | | what's my problem? As much as I like romance, I never invest enough of myself into someone to make it feel real cos I'm afraid of the results and jealousy and negative traits I take on when I'm "in love" which I think is nothing but a chemical state of mind anyway.
It's like I want something then slap myself in the face for trying to get it cos I wonder why I'm wasting energy on a feeling I don't think is real.
Hot/cold, on/off. I'm one of those at times. It's quite vexing for me plus whoever is stupid enough to like me. | 
12-16-2006, 08:10 PM
|  | and now what? | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Right behind you
Posts: 2,068
| | Quote: |
Originally Posted by crassy As much as I like romance, I never invest enough of myself into someone to make it feel real cos I'm afraid of the results and jealousy and negative traits I take on when I'm "in love" which I think is nothing but a chemical state of mind anyway.
It's like I want something then slap myself in the face for trying to get it cos I wonder why I'm wasting energy on a feeling I don't think is real.
Hot/cold, on/off. I'm one of those at times. It's quite vexing for me plus whoever is stupid enough to like me. | You gotta learn to deal with those negative traits you speak of. Avoiding intense feelings because you may feel jealous and whatnot is not good for you. Don't let fear screw possible good times and some great pleasure in the future. Yes, love can turn to hurt and heartbreak but that is the nature of the beast. Plus, if you REAAALLY are into someone, it is usually hard to not get invested in them, which makes me think you just have not found someone whom you can truly fall in love with yet, but STILL I think that not exploring the other possibilities won't bring you anything but disconnection which IS also a negative thing. Don't live your life in fear of getting hurt. | 
12-16-2006, 11:32 PM
|  | give me the sickest one. | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: fox in the snow
Posts: 7,733
| | | hey crassy
ive always wondered how people like you tick. i have no dignity; i just lay it all on the table my insides splayed out. which im proud of in a way and ive gotten to experience some really great things, but ive also experinced some serious embarasment and pain. i think there must be some sort of inbetween where you slowly over time become intimate and allow yourself to feel intensely without analysis but only after assessing that this is worth the investment and its possible horrible return
__________________ When I awoke, the Dire Wolf
Six hundred pounds of sin
Was grinning at my window
All I said was "Come on in".
Grateful Dead | 
12-16-2006, 11:38 PM
|  | Asking for It? | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: New Jersey
Posts: 1,321
| | honestly??  i'd suggest getting to figure out what you really want by getting to know yourself first, have fun, go out and all but practice making yourself a priority in your life,
its really hard to have healthy and happy relationships when you feel bad for the person who's with you.....btw ive been there and done that  But once i figured out how to really like myself and do what makes me happiest and keeps me healthy, shit started working out and I"ve had healthier relationships. And broke off the unhealthy ones, romantic or otherwise.
Probably not the answer you were looking for so sorry if its not | 
12-16-2006, 11:38 PM
| | myspace.com | | Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 518
| | | | 
12-16-2006, 11:50 PM
| | myspace.com | | Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 518
| | | 
12-16-2006, 11:52 PM
| | myspace.com | | Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 518
| | | | 
12-17-2006, 12:12 AM
|  | give me the sickest one. | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: fox in the snow
Posts: 7,733
| | | dear funhappy girl
ROT IN HELL YOU FREAK FUCK
love
geek
__________________ When I awoke, the Dire Wolf
Six hundred pounds of sin
Was grinning at my window
All I said was "Come on in".
Grateful Dead | 
12-17-2006, 12:48 AM
| | myspace.com | | Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 518
| | Quote: |
Originally Posted by dirtyplotte dear funhappy girl
ROT IN HELL YOU FREAK FUCK
love
geek | oh ho HO dirtyplotte!!!!did u here what u just said??!!!!!? u didnt even click on the links where I offered advice and solace to crassy --- u just chose the cowards way out and tried makin wit the abuse.do u have any solutions like I offerred that would work. I doubt it. | 
12-17-2006, 12:57 AM
| | myspace.com | | Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 518
| | http://www.scientologytoday.org/pres...scn-local.html 
Olalekan Fatodu, coordinator for Young Professional Nigerians in the U.K, commented on the formation of the new coalition, saying, "Like-minded individuals have come together to proffer solutions to human rights on a large scale. It is exhilarating to be part of a coalition that cuts across religions, gender, race and colour barriers."
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The Human Rights Coordinator of Church of Scientology of London, Mike Ricketts, expressed his support for the new group, saying, "We were honoured to host this event today and to be part of a vitally important new group." | 
12-17-2006, 07:51 PM
| | meaning is the old black | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: circa 1996
Posts: 1,404
| | Quote: |
Originally Posted by FunHappyGal | These photos frighten me in a way that cannot be verbalized. I'll simply quote them and hope it eventually scares you one day too. | 
12-17-2006, 07:52 PM
| | meaning is the old black | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: circa 1996
Posts: 1,404
| | Quote: |
Originally Posted by dirtyplotte hey crassy
ive always wondered how people like you tick. i have no dignity; i just lay it all on the table my insides splayed out. which im proud of in a way and ive gotten to experience some really great things, but ive also experinced some serious embarasment and pain. i think there must be some sort of inbetween where you slowly over time become intimate and allow yourself to feel intensely without analysis but only after assessing that this is worth the investment and its possible horrible return | What's people like me? I'm just a paranoiac as far as I can tell. | 
12-17-2006, 07:54 PM
|  | Behold... | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: If I tell you, come over
Posts: 2,851
| | | Romance is a bit overrated. You shouldnt worry about it so much. | 
12-20-2006, 02:34 AM
|  | ---------------> | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: blowing raindrops across a surface
Posts: 2,056
| | | are you bracing yourself for the shock of being letdown because you were letdown hard in the past?
i have my own trust issues. but it seems like the process of becoming involved with someone is an unconscious progression. a feeling of, finding a home in someone and gradually moving in. WHY are you paying so much attention to that? you would know better than anyone.
is there an imaginary person you could envision not feeling so possessive over? a more sturdy kind of home. reassuring. communicates themselves sincerely?
i have special needs. i only feel safe around really nurturing people.
__________________ INSPIRATION. LIBIDO. APPETITE.
____ _ _ ___ ___ _ _ _ ______ __ _ __ _ _ ___ _ _ ____
_______ _ _ _ _______ _ __ ___ __ _ _ _ ________ | 
12-21-2006, 12:51 AM
|  | free hugs | | Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: 'states
Posts: 1,094
| | Quote: |
Originally Posted by alpha zygote
i have my own trust issues. but it seems like the process of becoming involved with someone is an unconscious progression. a feeling of, finding a home in someone and gradually moving in. WHY are you paying so much attention to that? you would know better than anyone.
i have special needs. i only feel safe around really nurturing people. | yes i agree.
i am a really nurturing person. so if my boyfriend doesnt really return the favor (ie complimenting me like every day) i kinda get irate because i think i'm a really lovey person. hugs, cuddling, kisses, etc.
anyway, back on topic. i dont think you can really enjoy what a relationship has to offer if you dont fully trust the person and give them everything you can. its the best feeling in the world when things are mutual. maybe you are scared. | 
12-21-2006, 05:02 PM
| | ive got nothing to say | | Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 7,196
| | | crassy. you uptight bitch.
__________________ except i hate you. | 
12-21-2006, 08:31 PM
|  | So, what now? | | Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 504
| | Quote: |
Originally Posted by crassy As much as I like romance, I never invest enough of myself into someone to make it feel real cos I'm afraid of the results and jealousy and negative traits I take on when I'm "in love" which I think is nothing but a chemical state of mind anyway.
It's like I want something then slap myself in the face for trying to get it cos I wonder why I'm wasting energy on a feeling I don't think is real.
Hot/cold, on/off. I'm one of those at times. It's quite vexing for me plus whoever is stupid enough to like me. |
You sound heaps like me. By any chance are your parents divorced? | 
12-23-2006, 03:01 PM
| | meaning is the old black | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: circa 1996
Posts: 1,404
| | Quote: |
Originally Posted by cantankerous crassy. you uptight bitch. |
slap some sense into me, ok? but wear gloves, otherwise it's not quite proper enough. | 
12-23-2006, 03:02 PM
| | meaning is the old black | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: circa 1996
Posts: 1,404
| | Quote: |
Originally Posted by alpha zygote are you bracing yourself for the shock of being letdown because you were letdown hard in the past?
i have my own trust issues. but it seems like the process of becoming involved with someone is an unconscious progression. a feeling of, finding a home in someone and gradually moving in. WHY are you paying so much attention to that? you would know better than anyone.
is there an imaginary person you could envision not feeling so possessive over? a more sturdy kind of home. reassuring. communicates themselves sincerely?
i have special needs. i only feel safe around really nurturing people. | word to this.
And no, my parents aren't divorced. | 
12-24-2006, 01:22 AM
|  | ---------------> | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: blowing raindrops across a surface
Posts: 2,056
| | | basically you need someone perfect to show up like right now.
__________________ INSPIRATION. LIBIDO. APPETITE.
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