ok so blah i REALLY need advice this is something in which i really don't know what to do.

basically here's the ENTIRE situation, in detail:

my boyfriend right, i met him on the internet. we have a thriving internet community and we're all extremely close, its lush.

anyway, about um i think 2 years ago he was internet involved with this other girl from the board and he was SUPER in love with her. in fact thats how me and him became friends, we'd stay up all night and i would tell him all the shit happening in my life and there was loads and he'd tell me everything about her and there was loads. and we've always been able to talk about everything.

then they split up and she was awful to him, and ive never known anyone more depressed. he was really obsessed with her and he got creepy and she couldnt handle that - none of us are exactly "internetty" people you see, and i think the idea of an internet relationship is a bit whoah. it is for me at any rate.

right then at the end of august me and him met up and got together and it was wonderful. then i went to stay with him in manchester and it was lovely and we said we love each other and it was excellent. and we both really do, by the way.

and then we split up because he loves me so much he cant handle it or something, it made sense at the time. then we got back together the next morning.

and then i went to stay with him this weekend and im fucked up. he was coming down from a week long bender and he was having a really nasty comedown so me and this girl (also goes to uni in manchester and by the way is a VERY good friend of mine) went out and got pilled up and drunk and basically had an excellent weekend. but before the pills came this heart to heart where she basically revealed that she was still in love with him in a big way. she doesnt want to be with him since she knows she wouldnt be faithful, but me being with him is killing her.

she didnt have a problem when we got together, its just since she moved to manchester she's been through a lot of shit and he's helped her through everything. he's actually the most amazing person ive ever met and like, i love him lol. i also think she's jealous of us, im jealous of her and him. i said to her that he talks to her so much more than me and she said oh no he talks to you so much more.

but im actually right, he doesnt talk to me any more and he's basically ignoring me and i hate it. i just want to yell at him that im sorry im not her and be done with it but i cant, i cant think of anything worse than having them be together. i dont think me and him can last unless i go to university in manchester which i think would be really good, but she says she couldnt put up with me being in manchester and with him. although im having to put up with them. she sleeps in his bed all the time (which im ok with or i would say something but its like. well you know)

its not really fair of her to be like "oh actually i was a bitch to him but now i want him back" but like. really, i shouldnt be with him in the first place. blah.

ok this was too long but advice pleeease?

blah

it's totally unfair of her to be in love with him, and not want to be with him, yet be jealous of you being with him. you know.

i don't want him but i don't want anybody else to have him.

HE deserves better, she's basically holding his social/love life at ransom, because you're a friend of hers and he's too nice to realise what she's doing. basically she'll get pissy whoever his girlfriend is. is he supposed to be celibate and single for the rest of his life while she fucks half of manchester and keeps him on a leash.

i love you and him and her. in that order lol. but you know, this is shitty

__________________
said thanks for the insults and compliments
you'll never forget my face no more

There are no other girls sleeping in my boyfriends bed. Period. Negative.

Lack of respect on his part.

And he's not speaking to you, why? Sounds like a bit of a jerk.

Hope it works out.

Luck,
a.

oh lol yeah i should clarify the bed thing is just our crazy kid lifestyle. i spent the whole day in his flatmate's bed cuddling.

and hes not speaking to me because hes being a shit

discolexy i know i know i know but you know what can i do? i cant really tell you how shit things are for her right now. furthermore i sort of stole him off her in a roundabout sort of way. i definitely broke the never date an ex rule.

If he won't make a clear choice between you and her and keeps going back and forth between the two of you, then you have your answer right there. He's not going to change. If he really cared about you he would choose you and stop this bullshit, but he's not. So all you can do is make the choice for him and move on.