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  #1  
Old 11-28-2006, 09:13 PM
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caketin caketin is offline
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the transition from friends to lovers

supposing two friends realise they have feelings for one another and decide to act on them, become a couple or whatever... what exactly changes? are you still good friends, but now you kiss and fuck as well?

i am in this situation at the moment where it looks like within a week or two we will be officially together, but i feel like if we do get together there will be none of the excitement or butterflies or trying to impress each other that there usually is in a relationship with a new person. so doesn't it get boring? tell me please

i've never dated a friend before
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  #2  
Old 11-28-2006, 09:27 PM
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so are you just doing it for the sex? because there is probably no point in being lovers if there is no excitement.
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  #3  
Old 11-28-2006, 09:31 PM
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no, i like him and he keeps telling me he likes me too. it's not just sex. but that is what i mean, how do you go from good friends to a relationship without it being boring? if you already know pretty much everything about each other... where do you go from there?

basically, can a relationship with a good friend work?
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Old 11-28-2006, 09:33 PM
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I personally wouldn't do it, but get him in the sack and see what happens. Could work out.
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  #5  
Old 11-28-2006, 10:16 PM
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Even if you've been friends a long time, it shouldn't be boring when you start a new relationship. It should be exactly the opposite. Just for the simple fact that you've liked the person for a long time and now you're finally getting to be with them and experience the person in a whole different way, that should be exciting.

If you're not excited about it then maybe you are better off as friends.

And already knowing everything about them isn't a bad thing.... I don't see why that would make it more difficult to start a relationship. Just enjoy eachother's company and don't worry about the "right" way of doing things.
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  #6  
Old 11-29-2006, 07:54 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ShyViolet
Even if you've been friends a long time, it shouldn't be boring when you start a new relationship. It should be exactly the opposite. Just for the simple fact that you've liked the person for a long time and now you're finally getting to be with them and experience the person in a whole different way, that should be exciting.
what she said =)
and if you're already friends- shouldn't it be that you're not bored by each other?
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  #7  
Old 11-29-2006, 07:56 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by caketin
basically, can a relationship with a good friend work?
well me and my best friend got together after many drunken nights doing things together..
we were together for a year and a half, and now we don't speak very much, we havn't fallen out, but we don't have the same relationship we did before, stuff happened.
so yeah, unless you mind that happening.
personally, i'm not that bothered, because it did work for quite a while and we had lots of good times
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  #8  
Old 11-29-2006, 08:14 AM
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i think its tricky, like it works for a while but when you break up, it can be difficult to go back and be all cute normal friends again. think it through, but if you really like him and would just hurt all over if you didn't try, then do it. either that, or he'll find someone temporary and they just stay and you get upset playing the 'what if' or 'if only' game.
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Old 11-29-2006, 08:18 AM
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Be prepared to loose him as a friend when ye break up. Most of the time people cant go back to exactly how it was before ye became involved. It is inevitable that you are going to break up at some point, next week, next year, whatever, but the dilemma will cross you and you got to discuss "What if it doesnt work out" senario with him before you two embark on this new journey.
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Old 11-29-2006, 02:22 PM
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I left a 10 year marriage to get with someone who'd been my friend for 4 years. 2 years on we are still together, and have lived together since getting with each other, and have a month old baby. It's a good relationship, because we knew we liked each other, shared interests and had a similar outlook on life before getting together. It doesn't get boring, as our relationship is now on a totally different level than just friendship.
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  #11  
Old 11-29-2006, 02:25 PM
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my b/f was my best friend before we started dating, we've been together for 4 and a half years now
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Old 11-29-2006, 10:50 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dizzytart
I left a 10 year marriage to get with someone who'd been my friend for 4 years. 2 years on we are still together, and have lived together since getting with each other, and have a month old baby. It's a good relationship, because we knew we liked each other, shared interests and had a similar outlook on life before getting together. It doesn't get boring, as our relationship is now on a totally different level than just friendship.
no budy wanted to knw
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  #13  
Old 11-29-2006, 11:12 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dizzytart
I left a 10 year marriage to get with someone who'd been my friend for 4 years. 2 years on we are still together, and have lived together since getting with each other, and have a month old baby. It's a good relationship, because we knew we liked each other, shared interests and had a similar outlook on life before getting together. It doesn't get boring, as our relationship is now on a totally different level than just friendship.
you're really lucky!!! I want that!!!
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