so this guy was my first love, and my first. it's been at least 3 years or so, and i don't have feelings for him or anything. in fact, he's not quite the type of guy i'd be interested in anymore. but he works at a restaurant i go to a lot, and when i see him we talk a little, but not much, since he's working.

but i was wondering, would it hurt if i gave him a call and just said hey how's it going? what's new? and asked if he wanted to hang out, just as friends, with a group of mine?

btw, i got his number because a friend of mine took me to his friends' house, and low and behold, my ex was the first person i saw. and later that week the guys used his phone to call and ask me to come over.

but really, would it hurt if i just gave him a call and talked as friends? i know he doesn't think of me like that anymore. and i certainly don't think of him like that.

you obviously still have feelings for him just admit that to yourself at least.

hard to say.

sometimes it's better to leave the past in the past. but if you think he'd make a great friend, and that's the only place your mind is about him, then by all means. You can't really have too many friends.

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getting tired of the collective orgasm at the public declaration of the word "change"

Dr. Nathanson

What was the reason you broke up?


Just because he works at a restaurant you go to, it doesn't mean you have to call him. I would think it would be more sensible to just chat to him as an acquaintance when you come across him.
I mean, an ex is usually an ex for a reason, right?
Unless you think your life could be improved by being buddies & were 100% over him i wouldn't bother.


But then again I know people who are friends with their ex & everything has worked out fine - I suppose i'm not stable enough to be friends with an ex haha.

I think it might be wierd to call him out of the blue like that if you haven't spoken to him in three years. It might be better to just say hi to him in person the next time you see him, and then feel out the situation and see if there is a possible friendship there.

I'm in sort of the same situation.... my first boyfriend and I are friends now. We have absolutely no feelings for eachother anymore, and are just friends. We call eachother every once in a while just to talk and catch up.

I agree.

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Diving for pearls.

I want a lolly.

as u said u would ask him to go out with friends, just like friends...
just call and see. maybe u could regret if u don't do it

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i think you should call him.
boyfriends are not only lovers and partners and future husbands, but also companions and friends. just because your relationship didn't work out, doesn't mean you should cut him out of your life.

yeah. i mean, he's hot. but i'm not attracted to him. in fact, at that house we were both at, i think he was trying to get laid by some chick. dunno if that worked out or not. but it didn't bother me a bit.

No, leave him in the past, you had something 3 years ago, and even though you aren't the same person and he mighten be either dosen't mean you won't take a new liking. You had something with this guy and when things are familiar they are just easier to cling to.

Move on and eat cake.

Just small chit chat at the resteraunt is enough. Dont call him! If ye want to be friends then it will come up at the resteraunt and convo can end naturally. Over the phone one is obliged to say something to fill up space...and things can get awkward because of yer history.