OK, so I have basically just broken up with my boyfriend of 18 months- my first proper boyfriend and the only person I've been in love with- because I've accidently discovered in the last 24 hours that not only does he watch very dodgy porn, but he also has spend the last three months cruising singles websites "for the ego boost". He tried to lie to me about it, in fact he wrote a whole page fantasy about how he was actually just researching a website, but unfortunately there were a lot of holes in that version and he eventually was forced to fess up. Unfortunate, since I've always had a problem trusting people and a morbid phobia of being betrayed. Unfortunate also because I have bipolar disorder and have just quit the sleeping pills that were working as an impromptu mood stabliser. Any suggestions how to deal with this in the immediate term? I'm currently crying to hard the cat got scared and ran away, which kind of overthrew my immediate plan- hug him til I felt better. I've never broken up with someone before and this time yesterday my boyfriend was busy telling me how much he loved me and how he wanted to be with me forever. Please tell me there is an easy fix to heartbreak.

there is no easy way. and i cant understand why you would break up with him over porn, unless it was like child porn or beastiality or something. Guys watch porn, period.

Since he was your first serious boyfriend, it will not be easy. It pretty much took me a year to get over my first breakup. But it WILL get easier with each day. There's nothing that will make it easier but time.

If I discovered that, Id feel a lot of jealously and end up being more angry over time than sad. I can understand how you feel, since Im very uncomfortable with myself. I know it will be hard to get over..but if you really want to I think of all the shitty things about them and what Im better at and how my lifes going to get further than theirs.

Im a bad person.

The porn I'm not worried about, I can totally accept that. The signing up with a profile on multiple singles websites, asking to meet a "fun, interesting and out going girl", was the thing that really pissed me off. I phoned him up and made him cry, which made me feel a hell of a lot better, especially since by that point dehydration had dried up my tears.