in 1997 i read a book about a fictional town and wanted to live there. i don't even remember the title, but one character was a laborer who maintained the town's three cemeteries.

i fell in love with him and spent the entire autumn of that year in a lovely state. i can't describe it.
but i still feel him around when passing through small towns. maybe it's similar to going to the burial site of an artist who means something special to you, although i don't conduct myself in such a manner, so i can only guess.

i recall slaving over mix tapes to this character and NOTHING would come close. i would hear something like "northern star" by hole and figure it could work, but by the time i got it on tape i knew it was all wrong. i was trying to build a beautiful shrine and ended up with theme parks.
so i gave up a long time ago.

but in recent months i've heard two things that are perfect. one is white chalk. the entire album, but especially that song. it's exactly what i wanted ten years ago and i had no idea. this is becoming my favorite album of all time.
pacific coast albums have an element of nature to them, whereas atlantic albums are usually just about cities. which makes sense as there is a vastness to the land in the west that isn't as common in the east. but i love music with a sense of the atlantic & the land, especially if it isn't celtic music.

the other thing that reminds me of this character is the twin peaks theme, which i could have heard at the time but never did.