so anyway

my oldest friend is called siobhan. we've been friends for about 16 years, she's three years younger than me.


when i was 12 i think and she was nine, her mother committed suicide. she was a drug addict. she drank garden poison in a shitty hotel.

she was with ralph at the time, ralph was her skanky boyfriend who we think got her on crack and he lived at their house after her dad moved out when they divorced... i spent a lot of time there as a child and i'\ve known the family for so long they are my own family.

so anyway this was over ten years ago.

hr brother has been badly affected, he's introverted and violent and angry and refuses to see a psychiatrist. basically he just studies martial arts all day and has little to no social life.

siobahn is different. she's at uni and has loads of friends and is really pretty and she's doing really well... except i think she has a drinking problem, she tells loads of lies, she craves attention, she cuts, and she's on antidepressants.

so anyway... today she went to buy second hand books in newtown and she says she saw ralph. he was begging on the street.

apparently he called her marie, told her she looks like marie. (her mom. and she does look like her)
she asked him what happened to her mom, he said she woke him in the middle of the night foaming at the mouth and asked him to take her to the hospital, he told her to go back to sleep and she was dead in the morning.
basically she started crying and called him a cunt and he started ranting shotuing that her mother was a whore and it was her own fault...

i feel so much anger, she's so fucked up about it.


i mean i want to go find him tomorrow, with her brother and kick the shit out of him. he's a homeless crack addict but still ... i want him to know what damage he's done... how he fucked up two innocent babies...

i'm seriously so angry i just see red... i don't know what to do

__________________
said thanks for the insults and compliments
you'll never forget my face no more

that's fucked up.

yeah, i don't know. i'm just so confused because i don't know what to feel


i didn't realise how much anger i have to him

__________________
said thanks for the insults and compliments
you'll never forget my face no more

hi

i'd really appreciate it someone could comment or say something that will help me think better about this because it's actually driving me crazy. and i don't really know what to feel or do or say. or how to react.

__________________
said thanks for the insults and compliments
you'll never forget my face no more

wow, i am really sorry to hear this happened. that is terrible. my heart goes out to you and your friend(s). i don't think kicking the shit out of him will do any good, but i certainly understand the extreme anger coming up.

as horrible as this sounds, i believe she was meant to know this information and perhaps it can have some healing effect. if you really look at it, this indicates that her mother had second thoughts and did not actually want to die. perhaps that can give your friend and her brother some sense of peace and acceptance of what happened?

i don't know. i wish i could say something more but i just don't know what to say. it's awful. i find it interesting how you say your friend is "doing really well" and then go on to list a slew of characteristics that i would not equate with "really well"...

so if anything, i think this should be used as an opportunity for growth and understanding or closure.