My transfer plans last year fell through (because all the family members who told me to "just take out loans" for the tuition suddenly decided that borrowing money was a "huge mistake" when I needed a cosigner... ) so now I have two financially feasible options for schools that I would consider:

A) Huge state university that's a 'good school' and well respected in the state, not too prestigious but has a huge alumni network. I'd be paying instate tuition so I would be able to live on my own in a condo, apartment, or something. I have one really good friend that goes there and several people I was friendly with in high school, and my aunt and cousins (who I'm close with) live in the area. It's in a small town, but a college town and people who live there tell me there's stuff to do. I would have to wait till next fall to start, which means 6 more months here.

B) Private liberal arts school, great school and locally prestigious, though small (which I prefer), in Birmingham. I took classes there one summer and loved it. It's in a decent sized city, close to downtown with plenty of stuff to do. They have a 4-1-4 academic calendar, which means there's a January term where you do an interesting class or project locally or you travel abroad as part of some program (which to me sounds more attractive than standard semester-long study abroad things where you just take classes). To afford it I'd have to get a scholarship and live with my grandmother or dad, and it would still cost a lot. I don't have any friends at the school, just friendly acquaintances from high school, but my best friend (the "would be my boyfriend if we didn't live 3000 miles apart but now we're just really good friends" guy) and a few other friends go to a college just a few minutes from it so I'd still have people to hang out with from the start. My hesitation is that I don't know that I want to move back in with family, since I like living on my own. I love staying with my grandmother but that would still stop me from being able to do things like stay out all night with everyone else. I'd be able to start there in the spring (feburary I believe, since they're on a 4-1-4 calendar) which would be really nice, I'd essentially just not come back to CA after christmas break.

Which would you choose? I keep going back and forth. A is Auburn University and B is Birmingham Southern College if anyone is familiar with them. I'll have to decide in the next month or so probably and I'm not sure which I prefer -- I keep leaning towards one for a few weeks, then feeling drawn to the other. If everything was equal I'd probably choose the second but I'm not sure if I like the costing a lot more money (even though, honestly, it wouldn't be my money) thing or the having to move in with family. They're both academically respected enough that if I graduated with good grades and a decent resume from either of them I'd be able to do what I wanted, basically.

Having friends who go to a certain school shouldn't really be a factor in your decision. I think the major difference is living on your own vs. having to live with your parents. How important to you is being independent and living on your own? Personally I would never choose living with my parents if I had the option to be away from them.

If I lived with my grandmother, it wouldn't be like living with my parents now. I've stayed with her a lot and she pretty much lets me do what I want -- the only "rules" she's had are the things my mom has called and told her to not let me do. Really the only thing that would bother me about it would be possibly having a curfew, even though I could just sleep over with female friends if I wanted. If I lived with my dad it'd be different because he has a crowded house (my stepmom and siblings live with him), but I'd probably just sleep there during the week because he's closer to the campus and go to my grandmother's for the weekend. He wouldn't be really strict with me either, I might have to be home at some certain time because everyone in the house wakes up early and I couldn't stumble home drunk or anything (I don't do much drinking anyways though). Plus, I'm not financially independent at all and would stay with people on weekends. The only difference would be living alone because since I'm not making money I couldn't really consider myself independent anyways. They're both people I've never lived with, so it wouldn't really be like staying with my parents so much as moving in with someone else. I agree, I wouldn't want to stay with my parents here, but they're the types to constantly ask questions of where I'm going and why and not want me to drive at rush hour or be out after dark and want to know biographies of every person I'm with. Also, a large part of my decision to come here was the fact that I could have an apartment by myself, and I know now that that was not something I should have based a decision on.

About the friends thing...Part of the reason I'm not happy where I am is that I came in knowing no one to a cliquey commuter sort of college and found it impossible to meet anyone. I imagine I'd be in the same situation if I moved to a really big college as a transfer. I just figure that if I have a group of people to hang out with initially, meet their friends, go to parties with, etc, then it'll be a lot easier for me to branch out and make my own network of friends than if I went in literally knowing no one to start from scratch, in classes with people who already had established groups of friends (rather than freshmen who are meeting people all the time).

choice B sounds better.

Go to the liberal arts college. You'll end up having more fun.