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07-11-2006, 07:42 PM
|  | Prince, Don't Sue Me! | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Erotic City, Florida
Posts: 1,806
| | | Where is Suri Cruise? Apparently this is news. Cnn Entertainment news. Watch the clip.
EDIT: wrong link, lemme find it. | 
07-11-2006, 07:45 PM
|  | Prince, Don't Sue Me! | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Erotic City, Florida
Posts: 1,806
| | http://www.cnn.com/SHOWBIZ/
Ok if you go there, theres a link, with some news on the birth certificate and all signed by a nurse not the dr, and a family friend, not the parents. Just more bizarreness from the bazarre. | 
07-11-2006, 07:47 PM
|  | Smokin' and drinkin' | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Peter Cook's ashtray
Posts: 5,141
| | | Yeah, and no one's seen the kid for like 84 days.
I don't believe they had a kid, ever. Isn't he sterile?
And a fuckwit? | 
07-11-2006, 07:48 PM
|  | Prince, Don't Sue Me! | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Erotic City, Florida
Posts: 1,806
| |
From Defamer...
It seems that Us Weekly has abandoned any hope of landing the first, heavily discounted pictures of Suri Cruise, settling instead on moving glossy product by spotlighting Tom Cruise's profoundly strange delay of the initial public appearance of his possibly nonexistent daughter as the BABY MYSTERY, even going so far as to run a Where's Suri? clock counting the days since the Miracle Baby's alleged birth. But after three months of waiting for proof that Cruise can at least be bothered to pull a stand-in baby off the toddler rack for a photo shoot to ease the public's suspicions, we're ready to upgrade the situation from "mystery" to "riddle that would make the Sphinx incontinent." To add to the weirdness, Us reports that even Cruise's BFFs, both of the regular and Scientological flavors, have yet to gain an audience with the world's most elusive rugrat:
Three months after her birth, Baby Suri, is still unseen, even by the family's closest friends. A source says Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have yet to show her off to fellow Scientologists John Travolta, Kelly Preston and Lisa Marie Presley. Even good pals Will and Jada Pinkett Smith supposedly have not met her, despite repeated calls to Cruise. "Every time, it's a different excuse: He's busy or Kate's not feeling well," says a source. '[The Smiths] think it's so weird."
After such an interminable build-up, Cruise, always the master of self-promoting spectacle, will certainly pull off an impressive stunt when he finally decides it's time to show off his daughter in public. Tens of thousands of stunned baseball fans will surely gape in disbelief as he and young Suri tandem-skydive onto the infield at Dodger Stadium as Katie Holmes sweetly waves from a circling Goodyear Blimp, then will be delighted to discover that the incredibly generous megastar has cloned enough babies for each fan to take home his or her own perfect genetic replica of his beloved offspring from the ballpark. | 
07-11-2006, 07:49 PM
|  | Prince, Don't Sue Me! | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Erotic City, Florida
Posts: 1,806
| | | I wonder how long it will take that psycho babbling scientologist loving FunHappyGal to get in here and be like close this thread mods you fuckwits, claiming shes seen suri herself and tom is god. | 
07-11-2006, 07:50 PM
|  | Smokin' and drinkin' | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Peter Cook's ashtray
Posts: 5,141
| | | He's so gross. He looks like he smells like anchovies.
:enter FunHappyGal calling me a ho, amongst other names: | 
07-11-2006, 07:52 PM
|  | Prince, Don't Sue Me! | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Erotic City, Florida
Posts: 1,806
| | | Yeah he's creepy. And Kat(i)e seems like shes been killed and brought back as a robot. No emotion in her eyes what so ever. | 
07-11-2006, 07:53 PM
|  | Smokin' and drinkin' | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Peter Cook's ashtray
Posts: 5,141
| | | Since FunHappyGal allegedly "left" Kittyradio, here's what she would post had she been here to read these posts:
U fucken idiots! Tom Cruise is da bomb, u r just jeles that he is so cool! Isn't it cute that Tom is a racist and tried to give Suri token African-American, "diverse" friends in Kanye and Jamie Foxx? That is so cute, and very NOT closet racist or anything. U guyz r just assholes! LOLZ, emily37856238745 and Nikki are just bitchez, hoez, and trick ass markz | 
07-11-2006, 07:55 PM
|  | Prince, Don't Sue Me! | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Erotic City, Florida
Posts: 1,806
| | | They'll probably come up with some strange scientology law that newborns aren't allowed into sunlight or around people for the first year of the babies life. And then only on the 12th day after the first year she can meet one person at a time... ya know some whackjob law like that.
Well since he handpicked her uncles, how come they haven't met her yet? | 
07-11-2006, 07:56 PM
|  | Prince, Don't Sue Me! | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Erotic City, Florida
Posts: 1,806
| | Quote: |
Originally Posted by emily34695 Since FunHappyGal allegedly "left" Kittyradio, here's what she would post had she been here to read these posts:
U fucken idiots! Tom Cruise is da bomb, u r just jeles that he is so cool! Isn't it cute that Tom is a racist and tried to give Suri token African-American, "diverse" friends in Kanye and Jamie Foxx? That is so cute, and very NOT closet racist or anything. U guyz r just assholes! LOLZ, emily37856238745 and Nikki are just bitchez, hoez, and trick ass markz | Haha spot on!
Why did FHG leave? She was so much fun.
FHG reminds me of TeamHardCore= THC. | 
07-11-2006, 07:57 PM
|  | Smokin' and drinkin' | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Peter Cook's ashtray
Posts: 5,141
| | Quote: |
Originally Posted by Darling Nikki Haha spot on!
Why did FHG leave? She was so much fun. | She was mad at all of us because we couldn't accept her "religion." The subsequent cry for attention is in Rants and Raves, about the second thread down, you'll instantly notice it. | 
07-11-2006, 08:03 PM
|  | Prince, Don't Sue Me! | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Erotic City, Florida
Posts: 1,806
| | | She'll be back. They all are. | 
07-11-2006, 08:06 PM
|  | now I know you better | | Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 698
| | | sadly yes she will be back, she thrives on this shit
and I don't think suri ever existed anywhere, tom is gay and sterile and katie has dead zombie eyes, the whole thing is a fucking sham and they will come out soon with "suri" that they adopted whenever they have a new movie coming out and need the press | 
07-11-2006, 08:12 PM
|  | Prince, Don't Sue Me! | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Erotic City, Florida
Posts: 1,806
| | | Exactly!
Suri will probably be another race and they'll have a couch jumping excuse for that. | 
07-11-2006, 08:16 PM
|  | Smokin' and drinkin' | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Peter Cook's ashtray
Posts: 5,141
| | Quote: |
Originally Posted by Darling Nikki Exactly!
Suri will probably be another race and they'll have a couch jumping excuse for that. | This whole thing is pretty surreal. Katie probably thought she'd fuck the "Hottest Guy in the World" and her life would be perfect. And the whole thing turns her mind into mush. They should make a suspense film about this whole thing. | 
07-11-2006, 08:21 PM
|  | holy mess | | Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 288
| | | I think she doesn't exist.
Or if she does, she's actually adopted from someone else and she's too old to show to the media because she won't look like a newborn.
Have you heard about the new birth certificate controversy?
I think this kid is not real and Katie Holmes was NEVER pregnant. | 
07-11-2006, 08:28 PM
|  | Smokin' and drinkin' | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Peter Cook's ashtray
Posts: 5,141
| | Quote: |
Originally Posted by orchid I think she doesn't exist.
Or if she does, she's actually adopted from someone else and she's too old to show to the media because she won't look like a newborn.
Have you heard about the new birth certificate controversy?
I think this kid is not real and Katie Holmes was NEVER pregnant. | Apparently the birth certificate was filed way late, which is weird. Like 20 days after the birth. Usually they are filed within 10 days.
My mom's was filed way late, but then again my mother was ADOPTED. | 
07-11-2006, 08:44 PM
|  | Prince, Don't Sue Me! | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Erotic City, Florida
Posts: 1,806
| | Quote: |
Originally Posted by emily34695 Apparently the birth certificate was filed way late, which is weird. Like 20 days after the birth. Usually they are filed within 10 days.
My mom's was filed way late, but then again my mother was ADOPTED. | Interesting. It works into the whole adopted suri thing then. And what kind of parents don't actually sign the birth certificate? It was probably the actual mother who signed or something. | 
07-11-2006, 08:47 PM
|  | Is This What My Body Said | | Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 9,334
| | | Ewwwww! He's like that damned horny uncle that keeps hitting on your sister when he's drunk and oh so lonely.
Gross. And she's the Russian immigrant who wants a Green Card.
__________________ WE MADE BROWNIES. I THINK WE'RE DEAD. | 
07-11-2006, 08:49 PM
|  | Prince, Don't Sue Me! | | Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: Erotic City, Florida
Posts: 1,806
| | | She'll probably be seen by the public when shes like supposed to be 4 but she'll actually be 6, they picked the runt though so she'd look yo | |