One thing that helped me was the day my youngest son said, "Mom, you have no context to understand
Courtney; she is not of your world. She cares about power, and it's all about who is more powerful than whom. You care about things like connection and good will, and she hates those things. Anything to do with human kindness enrages her. And she thinks you're a total wimp."
She sounds really full of herself...