I don't know what forum to put this in.. I guess this one is the correct one.

I have an amazing boyfriend. I love him to pieces and I've never been so happy.. he is truely incredible. I've never met anyone like him.
The thing is, when we first got together, he felt abit paranoid. My ex was extremely skinny and kinda gaunt looking, and my boyfriend felt overweight compared to him. I guess he was a little chubby a few months back, but I wouldn't say 'overweight'. Anyway, he started this diet and lost a couple of stone which was really noticable. But it wasn't over the top, so I was alright with it. I was alright with his body in the first place, but i must admit, when he lost that two stone he looked great. The thing is, he hasn't stopped... I dare ask how much he weighs now but I know he's under weight. It was a couple of months ago when my friend jack and I began to really worry...
Last christmas, Jack bought this t-shirt for him and I remember my boyfriend being pissed off because it was way too tight. He put it on a couple of months ago and it was hanging off him.. really baggy. I began to realise how obsessive he was about this diet, but he never listened.
It's not that i have a problem with him eating healthy.. but cutting out the accasional pizza.. even if it was topped with vedgetables.. was abit hasty. He's cut out so much food in this diet of his.. he doesn't even exercise! He refuses to drink nothing else but water and the other day he asked me how many calories i thought there was in a fruit salad..
Everytime I tried speaking to him he would walk away or something.

A week ago now, we were at a mate's party and it was the first time my boyfriend drunk alcohol in a few months.. 'alcohol has way too many calories'..
needless to say, we got drunk. My boyfriend gets hungry, and drunkenly raids the fridge for 'some fruit or something' and comes across a pasty..
a pasty with vedge in it. Anyway, he stuffs it in his mouth and then about ten minutes later he began to cry.. i've never seen him cry before. I asked him what was wrong and he said in this really small voice 'I ate a pasty'. I couldn't see his face or anything, he was lying down with his hands over his face and i was so shocked to see him cry. Then he said 'Nicole i feel so sick, i think it's the booze' and i told him to go be sick in my mates toilet.

It wasn't untill the next day that he admitted to throwing up on purpose, to get rid of the pasty.. I must admit I reacted wrongly. I got angry. I went 'WHAT! But thats what bullimic people do!?' . I apologised and just asked him to look me in the eyes and promise me never to do anything like it again..
but i can't be sure anymore. I don't know if he is continuing to do it. My mate jack says he thinks my boyfriend has started doing it quite alot and I'm so worried. I don't know how to help him and i don't know how to understand his sittuation.


if anyone has advice or anything on how to handle this, please help.. I'm not sure how to approach him about it.. I love him and don't like seeing him like this. I have assured him that his body is perfect for me, but he doesn't believe me.

anyone???

This guy obviously has an eating disorder, which you can't fix on your own. He needs professional help. Try to get him to see a therapist or whatever professional help you can.

Yeh, I agree with ShyViolet, it's dangerous to just let him go on like this, especially now that it's got to the extent that he gets genuinely upset about eating a pasty.
Also, it might be best to tell his family about the concerns that you have for him. Just so that they are aware of what is going on (although, if he's lost so much weight they probably already are) and so you are not alone in trying to help him.

I'd mention something to his parents or close friends. He sounds like he has a problem and needs to get some help. It's not something you can or should have to try and sort on your own. Perhaps forward some counsellor numbers to him and if he doesn't believe he has a problem or doesn't react well personally then perhaps pass them on to his parents so that they can try and make a first step?

The only advice I can give is when you do mention it to him again don't make him promise you not to do it; as that will more than likely make him become more introverted about the problem as he'll feel guilty for hurting you because he won't be able to stop just like that as it's obsessive behaviour. It's very hard to not get cross and upset yourself when you talk to him about things because you want to help and it can be like banging your head on a brick wall when you talk to people with eating disorders, but try and keep a level headed approach and listen rather than question him.

I hope that he gets the help he needs soon, he's lucky to have someone as supportive and caring as you behind him, because it will definetly be something he needs.