I know it's not just me.

I've been working at non-profits of every kind ever since I was old enough to get a work permit. I never considered myself to be any sort of activist, but wherever my skills were needed, I was more than willing to volunteer my time or work for a rather low wage.

Even today I work at a non-profit and I really do love what I do. However, I have this nagging feeling that there are bigger issues I need to help solve. I am scared that I will want to begin a career in environmental studies. Why? I feel as if I've worked very hard to get this far in my art education and achievements. It's been difficult. There have been tears and disappointments, etc etc. I love that field.

But what do you do when other problems seem to be more pressing and more people need to do that work?

Do any of you work at non-profits? Do you see it as your career? Did you feel you had to sacrifice things to continue doing the work that you do?

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"We believe that the best of America is in these small towns that we get to visit, and in these wonderful little pockets of what I call the real America, being here with all of you hard-working, very patriotic, very pro-America areas of this great nation," she told the crowd.

I didn't fuck up the world so why should i try fix it

I definitely feel an internal urgency to contribute something to life and my small corner of the world, because it's absolutely beyond me how I managed to even wind up fortunate enough to exist in the first place.

I have had to sacrifice in some ways, I guess, to do what I do, because I take care of animals and have for the last several years at various dog kennels, and I've done it because I love dogs and because I have a natural talent and rapport with them that I couldn't see going to waste, and frankly, working with animals has both put me on the path to meeting some of the coolest people I've ever met (as well as some of the most fucking vile I've ever come across, which was also an important learning experience) as well as has helped me in a theraputic sense with certain issues in my life.

Point is, I'm a firm believer in living a life of purpose, whatever one's personal purpose may or may not be. I don't think you have to be directly out to solve the bigger problems of the world, if only because by simply trying to lead a good and decent life in the best way that you know how, you outpour a certain positive force into the larger ocean of existence that we're all an interconnected part of.

i want to kill all do gooders.

however i'd like to work for the aboriginal legal rights movement. because it actually does make a difference, and its real, and isn't a bunch of fucksticks saving the worldz.

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i won't be home tonight, or tomorrow night, or any other night. ever again.

pablita, i know a bit about how you feel. not because i feel that way, because really i don't, but my best friend is exactly like that. and what makes me sad about it is that she really works her ass off and just doesn't feel good at the end of the day because of everything she isn't doing or able to do. it just seems like a really sick joke played on a really nice person. and i've no idea if there's any end to it.

sorry, i don't mean to talk about your way of thinking like its a medical condition. i'm really talking more about my friend and how i think she's going to give herself forty ulcers no matter how much she contributes.

i work for a non-profit organisation. sometimes, most of the time, i really enjoy it, but other times i think, i am way too cynical for this job. which is why i wouldn't consider doing this kind of work for a career. because to be perfectly honest, i think we are doomed and nothing anyone can do will help. so why bother. also some bad things have happened between management and a good friend of mine who used to work there and it's caused me to be a little more cautious. just because an organisation as a whole has a really good message/attitude doesn't mean the individuals helping to run it do.

You just have to keep in mind that the world will always be fucked up and you'll never be able to do enough to really make that big of a difference. You are only one person. You have to focus on what you can do around you in your own community to make small differences. Think globally, act locally. The cause that's close to my heart is animal rights and I literally can't even think of all the wrongs that are probably going on in the world right now with animals because I can't handle it. It's too much and I know I'll never ever be able to do a thing about it. There will always be suffering in the world no matter what. All I can do is take some of my time and money to rescue the stray cats that I find in my neighborhood. Get them some medical care and take them in to let them lead happy lives instead of getting killed on the street which is probably what would have happened to them. That is the small difference that I can make in the world.

My affliction isn't that bad. I hope it never gets to that point. I've been thinking about these things a lot recently. I am at a point in my life where I am qualified to work in two fields and one seems more pressing than another at the moment. I'm not sure how courageous I can be. We'll see. However, it bothers me a little bit to be painted with the same brush as idealists because it has the connotations of being naive. I am most definitely not naive. I owe a lot to people who have helped me along the way, as my path could have been much different, and the least I can do is help others to do the same. That is all, in essence, that I would like to achieve. The world won't be fixed entirely, but there are things within my reach that I cannot help but feel are my duty.

In any case, I am thankful I can do work I love.

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"We believe that the best of America is in these small towns that we get to visit, and in these wonderful little pockets of what I call the real America, being here with all of you hard-working, very patriotic, very pro-America areas of this great nation," she told the crowd.