I had a daydream of sitting in weeds.
the sun in the ashtray,
thawing cold feet.
I had a nightdream of crying over words,
the most brutal and beautiful I'd ever heard.
I had a daymare of choking on tongue,
the swelling goes down,
just to fill up my lungs.
I went to sleep.
I kept my lids shut.
I'd sit in the the flowers,
but I haven't the guts.

xxx

i like it.

Thankyou
xxx

yep
it's pretty bad

i've seen worse. the first three lines were okay (you managed to use the word "ashtray" without it sounding too terrible, which is something) before it went to shit, but then you salvaged something with the last four lines.